Being Perfectly You is Key to Getting the Body You Want

Self Love


“I have to have a perfect body, or I won’t be beautiful.”

“I have to diet and exercise perfectly, or I’ve blown it.”

“I have to be perfect, or people won’t love me or I won’t’ be a success.”

Feeling like you have to be and do things perfectly or you are a “failure” is a common attribute of the women with whom I work.

Perfection is an expectation that can never be met. The stress of trying to fulfill this unmeetable expectation can be a serious blow to your wellness—and weight loss efforts.

If you think about it, life would actually get pretty boring if you were perfect.

You would never learn anything, get to challenge yourself or grow. It would be as if everything in the world were yellow. And while you may love yellow, you appreciate it so much more if there’s a little blue, pink, or green thrown in for some contrast.

Your body is your body. Its curves and shape are uniquely you. Its size and contours are different from everyone else on the planet. It is that uniqueness that makes you beautiful, not your conformity.

What is optimal for your body will be different from everyone else. While using another’s body to inspire you to meet your goals can be a useful tool, if you are comparing your body and finding fault or reason to criticize yourself, you are actually doing harm to you, your body, and are unknowingly sabotaging your weight-loss goals.

Seeing where you aren’t perfect is an opportunity.

Engaging in the process of figuring out what you do want, what you are doing right, determining what is optimal for you, and valuing how you are unique will help you harness the powers of the Universe to work for you, rather than keep you stuck in the rebound weight-gain cycle.

This is how you begin to sculpt and create the body—and life—you want. You reach for the body and life that is uniquely you.

This is where the fun is! This is having a life that is vibrant and fulfilling.

Let go of the need to be perfect. Let go of feeling like you should already be at your goal. Just jump in exactly where you are.

What is optimal for you? Who are you when you are at your optimal weight and are experiencing optimal wellness? How will that help you be more uniquely you?

Move towards that. Engage in that. Have fun doing that.

This is life! This is thriving! This is creating the body—and life—you really want.

Together we can do it!

Time is Running Out!

Join the the Love Your Way Slim Coaching Program today! 

This unique program transforms your mindset, integrates your core values and spiritual beliefs, provides exceptional support, and hones in on the most powerful actions you can take to make releasing the weight not only easy and satisfying—but fun! (Yes, it really is possible!)


Program closes Saturday. It won’t open again until January 2014!


Tips for Providing Weight-Loss Support

In Monday’s blog, I wrote about the importance of reaching out for support, and suggested tapping a friend or family member to be a Wellness Partner.

But what does it take to be a successful supporter? How do you know that your good intentions won’t accidentally submarine someone’s self-confidence?

This can be an issue when you see someone you love who is discouraged by their weight-loss results. You’re pointing out to them that they shouldn’t be reaching for that second cupcake really isn’t helpful—unless they ask for that kind of input.

I promise your loved one knows that the cupcake isn’t moving them towards their goal and already has enough internal struggle going on. Your pointing out their obvious behavior will probably make them feel criticized and tip the emotional scale to resentment.

Here are some tips for being an effective Wellness Partner.

  • Ask for accountability ideas. Instead of suggesting that you keep your loved one from eating that second cupcake, ask what you can do to help support them in meeting their weight-loss goals. Let them come up with how you can best hold them accountable, and then follow through with their ideas.
  • Be a cheerleader. Count and celebrate all the things they are doing right—even the really small things—and help them ease up on their self-criticism if they have stumbled. The emphasis should be on progress not perfection.
  • Ask for permission to brainstorm solutions. In your strong desire to help, you may mistake the need to vent for the need to problem-solve. Before you start firing off solutions, explore the problem and then ask how they could overcome any obstacles. Sometimes the solution is just getting them to see a situation from a different perspective.
  • Remind them of all the reasons Why they are working towards their goal. Stay focused on their ultimate payback and help them see that the feeling of discouragement is not only temporary, but is worth moving through.
  • Love them and focus on all the wonderful things about them. The absolute best thing you can do is help them see their value no matter what, and to maintain your confidence in them that they can reach their goals, even if they are stumbling. Your love and confidence serves as a beacon to them during their dark times of struggle.

Being a positive Wellness Partner will not only dramatically increase your loved ones chances of success, but can also strengthen your relationship and give you an energy boost, too.

As you enable another to grow, evolve, and be authentic, you are enabled to grow, evolve, and be authentic.

Together we can do it!

Create A “No Regrets” Policy

I haven’t been perfect this weekend. While I got all my workouts in, my eating has been a little on the high-calorie side, as is apt to happen when family gathers and we celebrate a birthday—in this instance, my husband’s.

In the past, a splurge like I experienced this weekend would have been enough to derail me. I used to suffer from a severe case of perfectionitis where if I didn’t do my diet and exercise perfectly, I would be so hard on myself that I would give up.

Fortunately, I now have a personal “No Regrets” policy. This gives me the ability to start each day with a fresh opportunity to do the very best I can, and to celebrate those actions that are moving me towards my goal.

Being more tolerant and supportive of myself has helped me lift the “all or nothing” requirement that I used to have for success.

This feeling that you have to do your diet and exercise program perfectly or you’ve “blown it” is very common amongst dieters and is one of the primary reasons that people fail to meet their weight-loss goals.

The good news is that you don’t have to be perfect. If you eat a cookie or two, it’s not the end of your diet. But if you give up then and down a pint of ice cream on top of it—well that’s going to be much harder to recover from and your progress for the week will likely be stymied. Too many weeks with no progress and the motivation to continue seeps away and dies.

If you slip, it’s much better to pick back up right where you are.

One way to do this is to let go of regrets. Those cookies might not have been on your eating plan, but hopefully you enjoyed it, and now it’s over and done. Focus on getting back on track with your next meal.

By creating a personal “No Regrets Policy,” you more easily and consistently move towards the best possible version of you.

What do you need to tell yourself to get back on track immediately after you have been less than perfect? What can you do to be more tolerant and supportive of yourself? What difference does that make in helping you meet your goals?

Together we can do it!