Become In-Dependent to Lose the Weight

What if you knew you had all the answers? 

Often, the women I work with want to be told how to lose the weight—and live their lives.

They want to give all the responsibility to someone else.

They are giving away their power. 

The truth is, no one can lose the weight for you.

You can follow all the recommended workouts and diet plans and they might work for a while. You may even meet all of your weight loss goals.

But unless you change on the inside you probably won’t feel any different. You may even still look in the mirror and see yourself as fat.

If you don’t make the internal changes, ultimately the weight comes back.

You will not have found the freedom, joy, or happiness that you thought you would get from losing the weight because you are seeking those things in the wrong place.

This is at the heart of why a significant majority of diet and exercise programs fail.

The physical change alone is not enough. The change you are seeking must come from the inside.

Truly, what you are seeking is In-Dependence. In other words, dependence on your own inner guidance and wisdom, which is linked to All-That-Is (God, the Universe, Source Energy, Higher Coach—whatever works for you.)

And the irony is, when you become In-Dependent (dependent on your own inner guidance), the weight is easier to release—and maintain. You get the body you want.

Your success, self-worth, and self-love is not dependent on anyone—or anything—else.

The Source of freedom, love, wellness, appreciation, abundance can only be found inside.

This means that you have to stop looking outside of yourself for people or circumstances to change, and instead seek the feeling that you think the weight loss will give you. That positive feeling is your guidance letting you know if you are headed toward what you want or away from what you want.

The first step in creating In-Dependence and learning to follow your inner guidance is to identify and articulate what you really want. Ask yourself:

  • What is it about being slim that I want?
  • How will that make me feel?
  • What can I think and do that will enable me to feel that way right now?

Begin to believe that what you have been seeking from losing the weight has been inside of you all the time—and is not dependent on your waist-size.

Together we can do it!

  • Are you struggling with your weight?
  • Are you worried about holiday weight gain?
  • Are you ready to get the body you really want?

I am excited to offer 2 coaching spaces to help you love your way slim. If you are serious about transforming your mind and body, email me at by November 11 to schedule your complimentary breakthrough session. These powerful, empowering sessions are available on a limited basis.

Don’t wait till Jan 2 to take inspired action. Start creating the body—and life—you want today.

Love Your Way Slim

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”

-Lucille Ball

Often, women who struggle to release weight are love-starved.

Oh, you may have plenty of people who love and adore you, but you don’t feel loved.

Perhaps you’re so afraid of being judged that you refuse to completely open your heart to others. Or you have expectations of how people should love you that aren’t being met. Or you’re so self-critical, that you believe yourself to be unlovable.

Overeating is often an attempt to find the love you crave and fill the void in your heart with food. It is another way of looking in the wrong place to feel comforted and loved.

At the root of this is the mistaken belief that love is something that is given to you, or that you have to earn or be worthy of. That love comes from outside of you. That expressions of love have to meet certain criteria before you will accept them as love.

What many women don’t understand is that they are intrinsically valuable and worthy of love. That love is the very core of Who they are.

Remember the infant you in your mother’s arms. What did you have to do to earn love? What conditions did you put on the love you were receiving? What did you have to change about yourself to be worthy of love?

Regardless of what you have said and done in this life, what you have experienced, or how you have been treated, you are just as loved, lovable, and loving as the infant you.

Allowing yourself to feel loved is key to getting the body–and life–you want.

To see lasting changes in your body, it’s important to begin to crack that shell of protection you have created and allow love to trickle in from alternative places—from All-That-Is (God, the Universe, Source Energy, Higher Coach—whatever works for you) and from yourself.

Here are a couple of proven ways to begin to feel the love.

A powerful way to feel the love is to begin appreciating yourself. Not only can you turn your attention to those physical parts of you that you can appreciate, but also the internal parts. Begin to appreciate Who you are. Are you generous? Funny? Dedicated? Focused? Pay attention to and compliment yourself on your good qualities.

You can also appreciate the things that you do. Is the garden you have been tending overflowing with beautiful flowers? Did your kindness or compliment make someone smile? Did you get in your workout or stick to your eating plan? Count all the things you can appreciate about yourself—inside and out—and acknowledge and celebrate those things.

As you appreciate yourself, you begin to grow the love you have for yourself. You also grow the love you have to give to others.

Truly, loving yourself enough to take care of you—body, mind, and spirit—is what gives you the physical and spiritual capital to spend on others. 

“Life is here for you to live to the fullest. Take your courage in your hands and move out into Life. Ask for what you want. Believe that you deserve it, and then allow Life to give it to you.”

Louise Hay

Together we can do it!

Did You Receive the Gift?

When I took the dogs outside for their break yesterday, I was gifted by a single strand of spider’s web that was reflecting the colors of the rainbow. As I stood and watched it blow gently in the breeze, it was like watching a symphony of light as brilliant undulating colors moved up and down in different combinations. All caught on this single silky strand.

It was absolutely and utterly beautiful. And it would have been so easy to miss.

These kinds of moments are gifts from All-That-Is. How you receive them is how you receive life. How you receive life is how you receive everything—including that slim, healthy, and sexy body that you want.

Here’s a quick test to see how open you are to receiving the gifts from All-That-Is (God, the Universe, Source Energy, Higher Coach—whatever works for you).

When someone gives you a compliment, do you:

  • Explain why you don’t deserve it?
  • Explain why it’s a fluke?
  • Discount the value of it?
  • Say “thank you,” but feel uncomfortable?
  • Appreciate that they noticed, that you have that momentary connection, feel your worthiness, and bask in the positive remark?

If it was anything but the last one, you’re basically saying “No” to all the good things that Source is trying to bring into your life; whether it is a moment of exquisite beauty, a compliment from your partner, or the perfect functioning of your body.

Too often, women are so focused on checking off the next thing on their to-do list, are feeling guilty about not getting in their workout or eating something “bad,” or are just generally feeling bad about themselves or angry at others, that they miss those moments of synchronicity, coincidence, happenstance, miracle, chance, luck.

You miss the gifts of life that confirm your connection to the Universe, that are affirmations of how much you are loved and adored, that are the answers to the very questions you have been asking.

The reason is negative thoughts and emotions generate catabolic energy. Even a little bit of catabolic energy has a huge impact on your life.

For example, have you ever walked around with a pebble in your shoe? Even if you were in the most beautiful spot on the planet with mountain or ocean views, fragrant flowers in bloom, and lovely meandering paths, how long were you able to keep going before you had to stop and remove the stone, even if it was tiny?

While you had the stone in your shoe, how much did you focus on the beauty of the day and path, or was much of your attention on the discomfort? How much beauty did you miss being even a little focused on the stone?

Catabolic thoughts, feelings, and beliefs are much like that stone in your shoe. It doesn’t take much for them to distract you from the life you are creating, the joy and opportunities that abound, and the love that surrounds you.

The problem is, as we grew up we were told to “suck it up” and get used to the stones. That negative emotions are “normal” and that “others are responsible for our happiness.” Many don’t even realize they have the ability to shift their thoughts, feelings and beliefs, so they spend most of their time in catabolic energy.

It shows up as stress, dissatisfaction, feeling overwhelmed, angry, and even stuck.

The draining effects of catabolic energy accumulate over time, which literally impacts your body down to the cellular level. It is now common knowledge that stress impacts your health—and makes it easier to gain and harder to release excess weight.

It’s time to begin emptying your shoes of those catabolic stones. It’s time to take responsibility for how your feel, what you focus on and think about, how present you are, and how you receive the gifts of life.

Emmet Fox said the word “salvation” in the Bible means “perfect health, harmony, and freedom.” He also said that this was “the will of God for man.” And I would add women!

How willing are you to look for, acknowledge, and appreciate those subtle but profound gifts today? How willing are you to receive the health, harmony, and freedom that you have been asking for? How willing are you to believe that you deserve them and that your Higher Coach wants you to have them?

Together we can do it!

Thank You! More Please!

I don’t believe in coincidence.

To me, those moments of synchronicity, happenstance, miracle, chance, and luck are gifts from All-That-Is (God, the Universe, Source Energy, Higher Coach—whatever works for you) that we open the vibrational-door wide enough to receive.

One of those moments fell into my lap as I sat down to write today’s blog and was wondering what I would focus on in a short amount of time as we have family coming in today and there is lots on my to-do list.

Having just finished my workout and eaten my breakfast, I made my way into my office with my steaming cup of lemon-green tea and fired up my computer. As always, I checked my emails first, and there was one from Abraham-Hicks, one of my favorite spiritual teachers, offering a free preview of the first 10 minutes of a workshop, so I clicked on the link.

Not having read the fine print, what I didn’t realize was that the offer was to see the first minutes of a live workshop and once those 10 minutes were over the channel would be taken down. I just “happened” to click on the link just as Abraham welcomed the workshop participants—live and in real time. My timing could not have been more perfect!

And the words that I heard in those 10 minutes were a direct answer to a question I’d been rolling around my mind for the past couple of days.

What a beautiful gift that I appreciate to my core!

Those types of gifts are coming to us frequently, but often we are so distracted, overwhelmed, and disconnected that we don’t recognize them for what they are and we literally do not receive them. They can range from the simple to the profound.

For instance, just a few days ago, my husband and I were driving along and we saw a groundhog foraging on the side of the road. It was so fun to see this cute creature and I exclaimed out loud, “I love groundhogs!” The next day we were eating dinner and a groundhog came through the fence into our backyard and stood on a wall about four-feet from our window. He just stood motionless right in front of us for a good five minutes.

It was as if the Universe was giving me the gift of an uninterrupted view of this adorable creature so that I could have more of something that I love.

And just yesterday, a friend who is a single-mother who was having significant financial problems won over $100,000 in the state lottery. While this was certainly a profound gift for her, it was also a gift for me on so many levels, but primarily it was a blatant reminder not to tie God’s hands in the myriad of ways prayers can be answered. It’s our job to ask for what we want and let go of “how” the answer or solution may come.

One of the things that I was opened to this week was when we become aware of those gifts from the Universe to not only fill our hearts with appreciation, but to joyfully ask how this moment can get even better. And then to watch as more examples of joy, abundance, and love fill our lives.

There is no end to the gifts that Source Energy wants to bring us. The better life gets, the better it can get.

You can bet that after my fabulous experience this morning, I’m not only saying, “Thank You!” but I’m asking, “What other wondrous things can I experience today?”

What can you do to reframe how you see those moments of synchronicity, coincidence, happenstance, miracle, chance, and luck and begin to see them as gifts from All-That-Is? How does that change how you receive those experiences? And with gratitude and appreciation in your heart, what can you do to remember to joyfully ask how the experience could get even better, and watch for the miracles to unfold?

Together we can do it!

Photo by chrisroll /

All The World Is A Stage

Imagine that you are an actor on stage in front of an audience. You reach for a prop that is key to the script and it’s not there.

To keep the audience from knowing that a mistake has been made, you ad-lib a line that lets the backstage crew know what is amiss. Instantly, they jump into action to find a creative way to get that object seamlessly to you. Perhaps the next performer to come onstage will ad-lib a reason for carrying it on, or a new character will appear delivering the item.

You don’t know how that item will get on stage, but you know that the crew is bringing it to you as quickly as possible. In the meantime, it’s your job to keep the story going and work with what you have until it gets there. You also have to be ready to respond to the new situation so that the scene makes sense and the audience remains oblivious to the change in the story.

This is a little like life. Imagine that we are all actors on a stage in front of an audience. Only we have no time between sets or performances to reset the stage and put the necessary props in place. The Universal Stagehands are ready and able to bring us everything we need to keep the performance going, but they must stay out of sight.

Sometimes what we ask for doesn’t make sense for the storyline of the play, or will take some creative means to appear in a way that seems natural and seamless to the audience. It’s our job to ask for it and know that it is coming. In the meantime, we have to work with what we have until the requested item, person, or situation gets there. And until it does, we have to be ready to respond to the new and creative scenes that are developing in the storyline to bring us what we have asked for.

What messes so many Life Actors up is that they don’t believe the Universal Stagehands are on it and are doing their best to bring them what they need. Instead, they stand in the middle of the performance and demand that thing. They tell the audience they can’t move forward without that thing. They draw the audience’s attention to the thing that is missing. They wheel about on the stage complaining about the Stagehands, all the while missing each of their attempts to get the requested thing onstage unseen.

In this situation, no matter what the Stagehands try to do to get the Life Actor’s attention, they are ignored and the play continues to drag on in that spot making the Life Actor feel terrible. It’s often not until the Life Actor gives up and gets on with the business of continuing the play that the Stagehands are able to slip in unseen to deliver the requested item, and by then the Life Actor may have decided they don’t’ want it anymore, or may feel betrayed that it showed up too late.

Stop asking for what you want to appear instantly. It’s a process! The Universal Stagehands are on it! They are brilliant at what they do and if you just continue to play along with the storyline and jump on every opportunity they give you, everything you want will appear seamlessly in your life production. When you and the Universal Stagehands are working in concert, the audience will never know you didn’t have what you needed to begin with. It will look like it was part of the story and meant to be all along.

You are closer to achieving your goals than you can possibly imagine. But you must stop fighting your life production and the story that is unfolding. Relax. Begin to work with the situation instead of against it. Continue to do all the things that you can to give the Universal Stagehands a creative way to bring you what you want. Trust that they are exceptional at their jobs, and know that what you want is coming.

Together we can do it!



Photo by Salvatore Vuono /




Why Is Everybody Being So Friendly?

Since I’ve had a couple of non-perfect moments recently, I’ve been thinking a lot about perfection.

In the past, I thought that if I were living the life of my dreams, I—and everything else—would be perfect. There will be no more problems, everyone would shape up and act as I thought they should, and life would be easy.

This vision seems particularly good when you are constantly getting steamrolled by life. It takes a heck of a lot of energy to fight the rapids, and just the thought of getting bashed up against one more rock can leave you feeling overwhelmed and exhausted.

For life to really get really good, however, what changes isn’t the path and intensity of the river; it’s learning to go with the flow of the current instead of fighting against it. It’s adopting new ways to use the oars so you’re prepared when a rock emerges. It’s finding the beauty and exhilaration of where you are on the trip, instead of focusing on the rocks you’ve already encountered, or the ones you’re afraid are ahead.

While perfection seems like it would be good on the surface, it is truly not what any of us want. If the purpose of life is to expand and grow, what would be the point of never being able to decide what you want more of? What would be the value of never having a new experience from which to gain a new perspective? Why would any of us want to strive to do and be more?

For me, one of the key elements of relaxing and enjoying the ride was taking a close look at my beliefs about the Universe (God, Source Energy, All-That-Is, Higher Coach—whatever works for you.)

“The most important question you’ll ever ask is whether the Universe is a friendly place.”

Albert Einstein

There was a time I absolutely believed that the Universe was an unfriendly place and that it was out to get me. I couldn’t seem to get a break. Life was unfair, and the world seemed hard and pretty bleak.

That’s a depressing and painful place from which to approach life.

This perspective began to change when I learned about the Foundation Principle that “Energy Attracts Like Energy,” also known as the Law of Attraction. As I began to understand what that actually meant for my life, my perspective slowly changed so that I could see that indeed the Universe is every person’s biggest ally. The more I took responsibility for my thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and actions, the more I began to see my life change. And still do!

Today I see the Universe as a very friendly place. And I embrace another Foundation Principle, “There Are No Mistakes,” which means that everything we see as a problem, obstacle, or challenge is really an opportunity that when embraced can help us be the person we most want to be.

Making those changes takes practice, dedication, and focus. It means letting go of the need to be perfect and for life to be perfect, and to begin embracing Who you are and the life you have created.

If you feel the need to be perfect or to have life be perfect, how is that impacting you? Is it generating positive anabolic energy, or negative catabolic energy? What can you do today to help you believe that you are living in a friendly Universe?

Together we can do it!



Photo by stock.xching

What’s the Point of Pursuing Happiness?

Someone asked me recently, “What’s the point of pursuing happiness?”

The answer seemed so obvious to me that in the moment I had no response. My thought was something along the lines of, “Why would anyone not want to feel good as much as possible and be happier?”

Our two perspectives really gets to the key point. Being happy is a choice. Each person has the freedom to decide where they are going to fall along the wide spectrum of emotions and reactions to every single situation and subject. That’s our free will.

But it took me a long time to realize that I had a choice about being happy or not; that I had the ability—and responsibility—to direct the quality of my life. For too long I felt I was at the whim of an unfeeling and uncaring Universe that liked to batter me against the rocks. The world was against me and I couldn’t get a break.

That perspective was so painful that I suffered from chronic depression for many, many years. As a result, I’ve had enough pain and suffering, thank you. I no longer find it romantic, or a sign that I’m a caring or good person. If I am at the helm of my life—and I fully believe that I am—than I’m going to do everything I can to redirect this vessel towards freedom, love, joy, clarity, contentment, and fun.

To paraphrase Bruce Schneider, pain may be inevitable, but suffering is optional.

I can let go of feeling like I need to “fix” others or even see them as broken because if we are all the masters of our lives, then each person gets to decide which reaction and experience they will have. If they chose to be miserable, who am I to tell them they shouldn’t be? After all, my years of suffering were absolutely necessary for me to truly want to change, to be so focused and determined to find a different way that the path began to open up before me. Every one of my experiences was perfect for me on the road to where I am now, and will continue to unfold perfectly—for me.

The message that I want to shout to the world is, “It’s a choice! You get to choose! You have the power! And making a different choice feels so much better!” For those that it might help, I want to share how I did it and tools that I’ve learned so if they want to feel better, they have support guiding them towards their path. Their way will look different than mine, and isn’t that diversity what makes life grand?

For many, many reasons people will resonate with my message, experience, and process—or not. If being happy isn’t important to you or something you want, how beautiful is it that you get to make a different choice? And if it is, there are lots of ways to get there. Find the way that works best for you.

If we were all having the exact same experience and there was only one “right” way, the Universe would be pretty limited and from my perspective, the whole point of life is to expand and grow. Even scientists tell us the Universe is expanding. To me that is the very point of every experience that each of us is having—both that which we judge good and bad. Evolution is not one species making a quick jump to become another. It’s the moment-to-moment creation of our unique perspectives and responses to the ever-changing swirl of life.

So what’s the point of pursuing happiness? What’s the point—to you? Why is it important—or not—to you? That’s where the true answer lies.

For me, it’s waking up this morning literally laughing at a joke I created in my dreams. It’s feeling light-hearted and so filled with love in this moment that I want to share it with any person who wants to receive it. It’s appreciating my husband who I can hear right now in the kitchen washing the dishes.

It’s wanting to laugh instead of weep, being engaged and excited in my work, instead of dreading it so much I can hardly get out of bed. It’s knowing that today, I feel better than I did yesterday, and in tomorrow there is the opportunity to feel even better than today. It’s learning to go with the flow of life and seeing it as an adventure instead of purgatory. It’s because life for me finally feels good, and I want more of that, please!

There is no right or wrong answer. This is just where you are in your journey. Come along with mine—or not. And as you share your journey, it will either resonate with me—or not.

What is truly sublime is finding the people you do click with and who you not only get value from, but who you give value back to by sharing your journey, responses, and insights. We are creating an ever-expanding circle of growth, clarity, connection, and inspiration.

And that makes me happy!

Together we can do it!

Photo by Rosen Georgiev /

Situations for Appreciation

Admittedly, I don’t watch a lot of television, and I watch even less sports on television. But thanks to social media, even I know something of Tim Tebow, the quarter back for the Denver Broncos who has been cheered and jeered for getting down on one knee and offering up a prayer of gratitude every time his team scores.

Last night, my husband had on a football game that I was ignoring as I read when all of a sudden the game had my full attention. Tebow and his teammates put a sudden end to their playoff game against Pittsburgh with an 11-second throw, catch, and run that accounted for the quickest overtime win in the National Football League’s history.

And I got to watch Tebowing—as Tebow’s prayer in the end-zone is now known—for myself.

Religious debate aside, it is brilliant on so many levels and has lessons for all of us to learn.

Focus On What You Want

If you consider that one of life’s foundation principles is that “Energy Attracts Like Energy,” also known as the Law of Attraction, what is more powerful than focusing your energy on what you want? And in Tebow’s case, what he wants is to score and win. By kneeling down and offering up a prayer of thanks every time his team scores, Tebow puts his energy—mind, body, and spirit—into what he wants.

It doesn’t get much better than that.

The Power of Gratitude and Appreciation

Our emotions are way more powerful than people often realize. They literally affect our bodies, minds, beliefs, and spirit.

If you are focused on negative, catabolic emotions, you are generating destructive chemical processes in the body that literally eat away at your cells. They generate thoughts of self-doubt, create negative expectations, and shut you off from who you truly are and the energetic support of All-That-Is (God, the Universe, Source, Higher Coach—whatever works for you).

Positive, anabolic emotions generate constructive chemical processes in the body that build and support your body. They generate self-confidence and belief in your abilities, open you up to becoming the best possible version of you, and help you tap into Universal Source Energy.

At the top of the vibrational list of anabolic emotions are love, joy, and appreciation. Imagine what you would create in your life if you looked at everything as a situation for appreciation.

Link Your Thoughts, Feelings, and Beliefs with Action

Apparently, Tebow is aligning his thoughts and beliefs about the importance of giving thanks to God for the good things that happen to him with the action of kneeling and prayer and playing the game and scoring.

As we see in Life Coaching, aligning your thoughts, feelings and beliefs with action truly transforms your ability to achieve outer goals with extraordinary and sustainable results.

Don’t Worry About What Other People Think

“It is better to follow the Voice inside and be at war with the whole world, than to follow the ways of the world and be at war with your deepest self.”

Michael Pastore

If Tebow begins paying attention to all the critics out there, he will no longer be focused on what he wants, be feeling gratitude and appreciation, and aligning his thoughts feelings, and beliefs with action. If that happens, you can bet his game will be off. It is only by doing what he believes to be right—and letting go of what anybody else says, thinks, or does—that he is stepping into his true Power.

Now I’m not saying that you need to start Tebowing, but I would suggest you use Tim Tebow as an example of the power of focusing on what you want, appreciating what you have, linking your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs with action, and letting go of what other people think.

How can you focus more on what you want? What can you use today as a situation for appreciation? How can you better align your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs with action? And how can you let go of what other people think?

Do this, and you will be creating amazing plays in your life, too.

Together we can do it!

Photo by markuso /