Wellness Tip of the Day: Thinking about why you want to be slimmer and how it will feel is clearing the path for dieting and exercise. It makes the action easier.
Tag Archives: Thinking
Wellness Tip of the Day
Aside
Wellness Tip of the Day: Shift your thinking from, “I will be happy when I achieve my goal” to “Being happy helps me achieve my goal.”
Wellness Tip of the Day
Aside
Wellness Tip of the Day: Observe when your actions and goals aren’t aligning. Pay attention to what you are thinking and feeling. How can you change those beliefs?
It’s Worth the Weight
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In yesterday’s blog, I wrote about what’s behind the desire to wave a wand and have all your excess weight magically disappear.
Today, I’m going to talk about some of the reasons it’s worth the weight—to share the true value in experiencing the step-by-step process of releasing your excess pounds.
Because believe it or not, there is value in every experience. What you are thinking and feeling is part of Who you are, and the process you will go through to release the weight once and for all is about your becoming more powerful and true to yourself and Who you want to be.
I know this from experience. My weight and negative self-perception was an issue for me almost my entire life. I began hating my body at a very early age. I focused almost exclusively on its flaws, and what was wrong with me.
My negative self-perception—and my resulting struggle with my weight—raged for more than 35 years. Those negative thoughts bled over into all areas of my life. I was often depressed. I shied away from taking leadership roles at work. I had a hard time making close friends. I didn’t feel sexy or attractive with my husband.
And my struggle with my weight wasn’t because I didn’t know what to do. I taught myself about nutrition and exercise, and several times I got into incredible shape. I ran—finishing one half-marathon and doing all the training for another. I lifted weights. Several times I got down to a size 6. I knew what to do.
Even though I would lose weight, emotionally I didn’t feel any differently. All those problems that I thought would magically be solved by being thinner were still there.
This was because I wasn’t making the changes on the inside. I wasn’t aligning with what I wanted and why I wanted it. I didn’t feel confident in being accepted as the true me, which goes a lot deeper than just how I look. What it boils down to is I didn’t feel lovable because I didn’t love myself.
Because I was making these changes through sheer willpower, it didn’t take much for me to fall back into the pattern of regaining not only the weight I had just lost, but then some.
What ultimately had to change was what was going on the inside. What had to change were my thoughts, emotions and beliefs about myself, what I was capable of, what I deserved.
So in addition to consistently moving my body and eating healthy foods, I began looking for inaccurate thinking and practicing new thoughts of appreciation, praise, and support for my body—and myself. And I began tying this process to my spiritual journey. Accepting the love of All-That-Is (God, the Universe, Source Energy, Higher Coach—whatever works for you) was the path that lead to loving myself.
Successfully making these internal changes helped me not only get down to where I am today—between a size 4 and 6—but to keep the weight off now for more than two years.
Not only do I feel vibrant and alive, and have more fulfilling relationships in all areas of my life, but more importantly, those same internal changes have given me the confidence and self-empowerment to go after the life of my dreams, and reach out to help many, many women feel lean and sexy on the inside so they can be lean and sexy on the outside.
The process of releasing your weight is so worth it because it is a journey of self-discovery. It is reconnecting with your true self. It is embracing your power to create the life of your dreams.
Today I am grateful for all the struggles and challenges, and yes, even pain that I experienced over all those years. Every moment of it helped me be Who I am today, and makes me uniquely able to relate to other women who are using the path of releasing their weight for self-discovery.
If you are in the midst of the pain, you may not be able to feel, hear, or believe this right now, but I promise you, the end result is so worth the weight.
Together we can do it!
Photo from www.freedigitalphotos.net
Wellness Tip of the Day
Aside
Wellness Tip of the Day: What you are feeling is tied directly to what you are thinking. Practice becoming the master of your thoughts rather than their victim.
How Do You Want to Respond?
Woo hoo! Yesterday I had an immediate negative catabolic reaction to a situation!
Why is that something to celebrate? Because it lets me know where I have some inaccurate thinking going on that does not align with Who I truly am. By recognizing it for what it is, I now have the opportunity to shift my thoughts, feelings, and beliefs so that the next time I am in a similar situation I can choose to respond instead of react.
Each time we align a little more closely with Who we really are, we are happier, more joyful, have more fun, laugh more, stay more relaxed, and love more. In other words, the more we master our thoughts and reactions, the better our life gets.
Typically, that sort of instant negative reaction is due to how you interpret the situation—quite possibly inaccurately. This is one of the big blocks to creating the life of your dreams.
When you catch yourself jumping to a conclusion that shoots your blood pressure up, the best thing to do is Stop! Don’t take any action.
Unfortunately, I had a colleague call right at the moment of ignition and I spewed negative energy into his ear. Not the gift I was intending! Fortunately, when I called back to apologize, he was very understanding, but speaking from experience, it’s much better to avoid that in the first place.
When you can successfully hit the pause button, take a moment to breathe. When you feel yourself calm down a little, ask yourself, “What just caused that reaction?”
For me, some of my core values are connecting to others, creativity, and freedom. I had two situations in two days that I interpreted as challenging those values.
The next question to ask yourself is, “What is really going on here?” or “What’s another way to interpret the situation?”
In my case, I think we’re all getting caught up in the stress of some deadlines, which is leading to miscommunication. And boy do I know I have some issues around deadlines.
How can I react differently in the future?
I will cut my colleagues some slack and recognize that they are doing the absolute best that they can in the situation. I will seek to clarify the situation, and to improve my level of communication. And I will remember the Foundation Principle that “There Are No Mistakes,” take a moment to reconnect with Source (God, the Universe, All-That-Is, Higher Coach, whatever works for you), and remember that everything is always working out for me.
The next time you have an instant negative reaction, how can you let it be an “aha” moment reminding you to stop, breathe, and examine your underlying thoughts and interpretations? What can you plan to do differently so the next time it happens, you show up more as Who you truly are?
Together we can do it!
Photo by foto76 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
What Direction are You Headed?
Whatever you’re thinking about is literally like planning a future event. When you’re worrying, you are planning. When you’re appreciating you are planning. What are you planning?
Abraham
I used to be a worrier. It’s not clear how I came to the conclusion that to ward off catastrophe, I needed to hold the problem close in my mind, but that’s what I truly believed. My thoughts were an endless stream of judgment and fear. I practiced worry so much that I was really good at it.
It’s exhausting just to recall it.
Moving beyond that was a process of desire and persistence. I knew that life was supposed to feel better than it was—had to feel better than that awful place—and I wanted to find the way. That desire led me on a quest to find out how. Each book that I read and teacher that I found led me closer and closer to understanding the answer.
When I “got” that my worry was literally like planning a future event and bringing me more things to worry about, I felt panic. I was so good at worry that those thoughts came easily. I didn’t want more of that! The idea that I held the responsibility for my own life and happiness was so overwhelming that I literally had to disregard it.
But you can’t unknow something completely.
Slowly and surely I began shifting my thoughts towards what I wanted, and letting go of control. It took time, persistence, and energy, just like exercising your body takes time, persistence, and energy. It is a process.
Now I am in a much better place where I love and appreciate life and I feel good much of the time. But I know that I’m far from—and will never get to—having it all figured out, and can clap my hands together and proclaim myself, “Done.”
I know this because I have been seeking long enough to watch my mentors and their teachings grow and evolve. I know this because our spirits are eternal, which means an endless opportunity to expand and grow.
No matter where you are, your understanding, love, and joy always has the potential to grow.
Which means just relax. Don’t stress about it—anything really. Slow and steady is all you need to move yourself forward. Just practice focusing more on what you want, forgive yourself when you don’t, and strive to appreciate life moment-to-moment.
Do that, and you will be creating the life of your dreams.
Together we can do it!
Photo by dan / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Wellness Tip of the Day
Aside
Wellness Tip of the Day: What you are feeling is tied directly to what you are thinking. Practice becoming the master of your thoughts rather than their victim.
Redirect Your Thoughts
While I had an awesome weekend of coach training and connecting with friends and family, the mental and emotional intensity and the late hours left me mentally and physically tired.
When I’m tired, it’s easier to sabotage my thoughts, which lead to feelings that inspire actions that don’t support my goals.
For instance, when I got home Monday afternoon, I discovered that my husband had made Chocolate Chip Cookies while I was gone, which lead to a mental debate about eating some. In the end, I totally rationalized my decision to eat three cookies after dinner.
That’s not that big a deal, right? It’s not the end of the world, or my diet. No long-term damage was done.
But if I don’t make myself aware of those mental processes that lead to eating the cookies and let that line of thinking become a pattern, then I will consistently make choices that don’t support my goals.
Left unchecked, that line of mental reasoning can become so ingrained that when I’m trying to change my actions, it can seem like my hand is involuntarily reaching into the bag of cookies and moving them to my mouth.
If you’ve ever felt like your eating was out of your control, just know that’s a sign that you have some long-term habitual thinking going on that does not support your new goals.
If you can, try to document those unsupportive thoughts. They might be something like:
- I’m tired and I deserve a treat.
- It’s too hard to lose weight or eat healthy foods.
- I’m never going to reach my goal.
Then redirect those thoughts so they’re more supportive. For instance:
- What I really deserve is to be fit, strong, and lean. I have more energy and feel better when I eat healthy foods.
- How I look and feel when I am eating healthy foods and losing weight is worth the extra time and energy to prepare the food and stick to my goals.
- Slowly making progress means I’m more likely to maintain my results. Any progress means I’m moving towards my goals.
But in reality, we may be so out of touch with our thinking that we honestly aren’t aware of those sabotaging thoughts. Or we have so many thoughts racing through our head, it feels impossible to catch them as they’re happening.
If that’s the case, it’s a lot easier to catch the emotion. Negative catabolic emotion always is letting you know that your thoughts aren’t supporting Who you truly are.
Pay attention to how you are feeling when you are reaching for that bag of cookies. Notice how you are feeling when you contemplate skipping your workout. Jot down how you are feeling when you don’t want to get up and prep your food for the next day.
You don’t have to know the thoughts that lead to that feeling to create more anabolic supportive thoughts. Even if you can’t do it in the moment, go back later and create supportive thoughts that you can reach for the next time you are in that situation.
When you are coming at it from the emotional side, it’s helpful to write down these new supportive thoughts, and read and practice them daily so they are easier to grab hold of when you feel yourself sliding into emotion that is leading towards the action of comforting yourself with food.
You can use the process of redirecting your thoughts to reach any goal. Notice how you feel when you have successfully navigated the mental and emotional obstacles and are that much closer to success.
Use that new positive anabolic emotion to motivate yourself to keep reaching for more and more supportive thoughts. You can truly change your life by changing the thoughts, feelings, and beliefs that lead to your actions.
Together we can do it!
Photo by xedos4 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Time for Self-Respect
While I’m away at coach training for a few days, I’m running a few of my favorite blogs that you may have missed.
An old boss of mine had a sign on his door that read, “The floggings will continue until morale improves.”
It was a joke, of course. But how often do we try to motivate ourselves with the whip of internal insults, slurs, and condemnations?
Does telling yourself that you’re “ugly, fat, stupid, and lazy,” really make you want to get up and do your workout, or forgo the potato chips?
If spoken aloud, many people’s internal dialogues might be deemed verbal abuse. Sometimes this abuse can go on practically nonstop, every day. What do you think this does to that person’s self-esteem and belief that they can achieve their goals?
Pushing through this line of thinking to create action takes incredible energy and strength, much like rolling a boulder up a hill. And while progress can be made, without changing our underlying thoughts, emotions, and beliefs, one moment of mental fatigue or flagging self-discipline may result in our watching that boulder roll back down the hill, and our not only regaining all the weight we lost, but then some.
Changing our thoughts, emotions, and beliefs about ourselves, what we want, and our ability to achieve it helps break us out of this cycle of self-punishment. It creates a boost of momentum that makes our push towards wellness a lot more fun and sustainable.
A general rule of thumb is, “If you wouldn’t say it to a friend, it’s not appropriate to say to yourself.”
Begin treating yourself with the respect you deserve. Focus on all the reasons you do want to move your body and eat healthy foods. Focus on all the things you are doing to move yourself forward. Speak to yourself with kindness and encouragement, and celebrate each small sign of progress.
By doing the internal work along with the external work, you can achieve the life of your dreams.
Together we can do it!
Photo by Suat Eman / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
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