Wanting, Willing, Doing, and Being Transformed

While I’m in Washington D.C. giving two Energy Leadership workshops, I’ve asked a few fabulous bloggers to step in. Today’s guest blog is by Renée Vos de Wael.

It all started after my third baby was born.

I knew I had gained weight. And I had to go out to buy a dress for an upcoming wedding. So off I went to my favorite clothes shops, only I wasn’t able to fit into anything. After lots of shops—and even more tears—I found myself sitting on a bench asking myself, “What should I do?”

I knew that whatever I decided I needed to accept myself where I was at that moment.

Yes I had gained, and yes I didn’t fit into my normal size anymore, but this was definitely a crossroads. Is it bad to be a bigger size? No, because I still made new friends and my social life was wonderful. The only thing that was horrible was the way I spoke to myself. It was self-abuse and it was very painful.

From that day, I promised myself that this had to change and the choice was mine. I decided to take this moment as my turning point; from being this low I wanted to grow. How and when still need to be defined, but I left the shopping mall feeling lighter already. The dress came later and on that day I looked beautiful.

As I got off that bench, I knew something had to be transformed, but I had no idea how. But my thoughts were focused on what the goal was, and a I had a strong sense of “wanting.”

Not long after that, a helping hand was offered to me. My Mother-In-Law came to stay with us and gave me some space to make that important first step. My “wanting” turned into a “willingness”—my being willing to make a change.

The support was there and I needed to venture out into the world of new information. I was willing to learn more about what would work for my family—and me. This took the form of cooking courses, sport programs, etc.

Of course, after gathering the information, the “doing” was the next step. Let me be honest with you—it wasn’t always easy. I did a lot of different things, experienced pitfalls, and made mistakes that resulted in gaining weight back. It took me five years to get back to the weight I wanted to be.

But I got back there with a lifestyle that fits me. It was so worthwhile because through this process, I met myself again. I learned to really connect with others, to be able to show my vulnerability, and to accept where I am and how I see myself in the mirror.

For this journey, I’m very grateful for all the lessons I learned—even when I didn’t want to learn those lessons! It has given me so many new opportunities and new directions that the only thing I can do is to enjoy all of them. It feels like being offered a gift every day and the only way to figure it out is to open it.



Renée Vos de Wael (PCC) is an open-hearted and full-energy personality. She is a coach, educator, group facilitator, walker, traveler, wife, mother, and student. Being a globetrotter for over 10 years has given her an open mind and flexible attitude towards life. She is an intuitive who sees the beauty and light in people, even before they have noticed it themselves. Renee loves the idea that we can reinvent ourselves whenever we need—or want to. Working with and for people has been her passion. The different cultures where Renee has lived has taught her to view life from different angles, and engage in a life filled with challenges and opportunities.

A member of both the International Coaching Academy and International Coach Federation, Renee’s background is mixed in various spiritual philosophies. She has studied with many teachers, including Sonia Choquette, and is a trained Six Sensory™ Level 2 Practitioner.

You can read Renee’s blog at http://reneevosdewael.com/blog/