Tag Archives: quotes

How’s That Working Out for You?

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“The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe.”

Albert Einstein

What if the entire Universe is conspiring on your behalf?

What if you have tribes of Universal cheerleaders supporting you in every conceivable way?

What if no matter what may be happening in your life right now, everything is playing in your favor?

If you fully accepted that this is a friendly Universe, would you give up a little control? If you knew everything was working out for you, would you relax and let go of fear? Would you allow yourself to have more fun? Would you be open to taking more risks?

If you believe that this is a hostile Universe, letting go of control can be one of the scariest things you can do. It’s like putting yourself at the mercy of the enemy.

I know because I used to believe the Universe was out to get me.

I couldn’t get a break. I was waiting for the other shoe to drop. I was a victim to people and situations.

It wasn’t until I began giving up control, surrendering, and trusting my well-being that I began to fully experience it.

It’s one of those dichotomy’s of life:

  • You have to give up control to gain it.
  • You have to feel appreciated to be able to receive the appreciation of another.
  • You have to feel beautiful before you can hear and believe the compliments you are given.

Whatever you believe—the Universe will provide you evidence of that belief.

Open your mind and look for all the reasons everything is working out for you instead of all the reasons it isn’t.

Make lists of the things that are falling into place. Relax and play more. Practice accepting that this is just where you are in the journey. Expect a different outcome. Have a little faith.

As Abraham-Hicks says, “a belief is just a thought you keep thinking.” Little-by-little, step-by-step, practice believing that this is a friendly Universe.

And then enjoy the evidence of that belief.

Together we can do it!

Here’s a related blog by Terri Cole on the fear of joy. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/terri-cole/fear-of-joy_b_1703103.html

What Are You Afraid Of?

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“Every living thing—animal, human, or plant—experiences that which is called death, with no exception. Spirit, which is who-we-really-are, is Eternal. So what death must be is but a changing of the perspective of that Eternal Spirit. If you are standing in your physical body and consciously connected to that Spirit, then you are Eternal in nature and you need never fear any “endedness,” because, from that perspective, there is none. (You will never cease to be, for you are Eternal Consciousness.)”

Abraham as interpreted by Esther Hicks

“What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?”

Robert H. Schuller

In Saturday’s blog, I wrote about the number one regret that people who were dying reported to Bronnie Ware, an Australian nurse who spent several years caring for patients in the last 12 weeks of their lives. That regret? The wish that they’d had the courage to live life true to themselves and not the life others expected of them.

The biggest reason people don’t live true to themselves? Fear. Fear of failure, fear of what others will think, fear that they are less than Who they truly are.

As someone who spent a lot of my life buckled under the weight of that fear, I encourage you with all my being to throw it off.

That fear is a blindfold pulled over our collective eyes. It is not Truth.

The Truth is it is impossible to fail, because there can be no failure where there is learning and growth. And every experience is valuable.

The Truth is what others think does not matter. They do not—and cannot—know your heart. You have to search within to find that, and you are the only one who can know your heart fully.

The Truth is you cannot fail because your Spirit is Eternal. The point of life is living. There is no way to get it wrong.

“Live life true to yourself.” This is the wisdom passed on to you by those who wished they had done things differently.

It means letting go of false beliefs about Who you are, what you are capable of, and what you deserve.

It means letting go of fear that does not serve you.

It means listening to your own heart.

It means having faith in your eternal nature.

Every moment of every day you are creating your life. Each decision either holds you in place or moves you towards the person you want to become—the person you are meant to be.

What is one small thing you can you do today to live life true to yourself? How does that make you feel? How much closer are you to being the person you want to become?

Together we can do it!

Be True to Yourself

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“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”

According to an article in The Guardian, this is the number one regret that people who were dying reported to Bronnie Ware, an Australian nurse who spent several years working in palliative care treating patients in the last 12 weeks of their lives.

With the clarity that comes with approaching death, Ware’s patients realized that not living their dreams was due to choices they had made—or not made.

They recognized they were in charge of their happiness.

If I asked you if you were in charge of your happiness, would you find that exhilarating, or feel compelled to tell me all the reasons you’re not?

Reasons such as:

  • “My Mom, spouse, partner, friends, etc., wouldn’t approve, or thinks I should do something different.”
  • “I’m afraid I’ll disappoint or hurt my Dad, spouse, partner, friends, etc.”
  • “I’m trapped in my current job or situation.”
  • “I don’t have the time, money, experience, etc.”
  • “I have too much to do.”
  • “My life is good enough as it is.”
  • “I might fail.”
  • “People will think I’m crazy.”
  • “I’m too old.”
  • “I’m too young.”
  • “I don’t know if that would really make me happy.”
  • “I might make the wrong choice.”

Your reason may be totally and completely valid for you. Just recognize that either consciously or by default, you are making a choice.

Are you making the choice that feels best to you? Are you making the choice that aligns with your goals, core values, and beliefs? Are you making the choice that is helping you be authentically you? Are you making the choice that when it’s time to look back on your life, you’ll feel good about making?

If you are making your decision based on how others might feel, think, or be impacted, you may be taking away their choices, too. For instance, if you’re afraid to leave your job, you may be keeping your employer from hiring someone who absolutely loves the job and has a passion for it.

This doesn’t mean that making a decision that impacts others is easy—or is the right decision—but by truly picking the path that is best for you, you also create new opportunities and options for the people around you. Making the choices that are best for you will enable others to make the best choices for them.

What is one small choice you can make today to live life true to yourself? What difference does that make in your life?

Together we can do it!

 

Are You Feeling Successful?

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Can you be too happy? Will positive thoughts keep you from meeting your goals? Can thinking you can do something get in your way just as effectively as the negative thoughts generated by your Gremlin—that inner critic that tells you that you aren’t good enough?

I don’t think so, and neither does Shawn Achor, a Harvard psychology researcher and author of The Happiness Advantage.

In a funny and engaging TEDX talk, Archor shares research that shows pinning our happiness on achieving a goal actually hinders our progress. Instead, it’s being happy that help us achieve our goals.

As Archor explains in an Inc. online article, this is because every time you have a success, your brain changes what success means so that happiness is always on the opposite side—meaning you never get there.

But if you increase your levels of happiness in the midst of a challenge, he says “all of your success rates rise dramatically.”

The key is feeling positive, which he says allows you to be “smarter and more creative.” In fact, “optimism was found to be the greatest predictor of entrepreneurial success because it allows your brain to perceive more possibilities.”

And if this is true for entrepreneurs, it’s true for everyone. Being positive helps you become solution-focused.

One of the arguments that I hear most often is people feel their emotions and negative perspective are outside their control. Archor says, “It is a myth that we cannot change our happiness.” While happiness may come easier to some people, it’s a possibility that everyone can achieve–if they change their behavior and mindset.

And Archor’s research confirms that changing your mindset may not be as hard as people often think. “What we found was something as simple as writing down three things you’re grateful for every day for 21 days in a row significantly increases your level of optimism and it holds for the next six months.”

He adds, “The research is amazing. It proves we actually can change.”

Begin by shifting your thinking from, “I will be happy when I achieve my goal” to “Being happy helps me achieve my goal.” And then look for reasons to be happy right now.

Together we can do it!

Photo by federico stevanin / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Why Is Everybody Being So Friendly?

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Since I’ve had a couple of non-perfect moments recently, I’ve been thinking a lot about perfection.

In the past, I thought that if I were living the life of my dreams, I—and everything else—would be perfect. There will be no more problems, everyone would shape up and act as I thought they should, and life would be easy.

This vision seems particularly good when you are constantly getting steamrolled by life. It takes a heck of a lot of energy to fight the rapids, and just the thought of getting bashed up against one more rock can leave you feeling overwhelmed and exhausted.

For life to really get really good, however, what changes isn’t the path and intensity of the river; it’s learning to go with the flow of the current instead of fighting against it. It’s adopting new ways to use the oars so you’re prepared when a rock emerges. It’s finding the beauty and exhilaration of where you are on the trip, instead of focusing on the rocks you’ve already encountered, or the ones you’re afraid are ahead.

While perfection seems like it would be good on the surface, it is truly not what any of us want. If the purpose of life is to expand and grow, what would be the point of never being able to decide what you want more of? What would be the value of never having a new experience from which to gain a new perspective? Why would any of us want to strive to do and be more?

For me, one of the key elements of relaxing and enjoying the ride was taking a close look at my beliefs about the Universe (God, Source Energy, All-That-Is, Higher Coach—whatever works for you.)

“The most important question you’ll ever ask is whether the Universe is a friendly place.”

Albert Einstein

There was a time I absolutely believed that the Universe was an unfriendly place and that it was out to get me. I couldn’t seem to get a break. Life was unfair, and the world seemed hard and pretty bleak.

That’s a depressing and painful place from which to approach life.

This perspective began to change when I learned about the Foundation Principle that “Energy Attracts Like Energy,” also known as the Law of Attraction. As I began to understand what that actually meant for my life, my perspective slowly changed so that I could see that indeed the Universe is every person’s biggest ally. The more I took responsibility for my thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and actions, the more I began to see my life change. And still do!

Today I see the Universe as a very friendly place. And I embrace another Foundation Principle, “There Are No Mistakes,” which means that everything we see as a problem, obstacle, or challenge is really an opportunity that when embraced can help us be the person we most want to be.

Making those changes takes practice, dedication, and focus. It means letting go of the need to be perfect and for life to be perfect, and to begin embracing Who you are and the life you have created.

If you feel the need to be perfect or to have life be perfect, how is that impacting you? Is it generating positive anabolic energy, or negative catabolic energy? What can you do today to help you believe that you are living in a friendly Universe?

Together we can do it!

 

 

Photo by stock.xching

Where Are You Playing Small?

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I was having lunch yesterday with business coach Mandy Wildman when she asked me a question about one of my business practices. When I explained it, she very nicely let me know that not only was I playing small, but I was allowing my clients to play small, too.

Mandy was absolutely right. Even though my intention was to be of service to the most people, the reasoning behind it was a limiting belief.

This is why even coaches need coaches!

And it brought to mind this quote by Marianne Williamson:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

The challenge becomes recognizing when we are playing small.

As I clearly demonstrate, playing small can hide in the best of intentions. If we are only focused on the surface of our thoughts and don’t probe them for depth of meaning and the feeling behind them, we can easily miss where we are limiting ourselves—and possibly others.

Because we think an astonishing number of thoughts a day, it is often easier to discover where we are playing small by focusing on how we are feeling. Negative emotions are a tipoff that we have some inaccurate thinking going on.

If I had truly stopped to probe how I was feeling around that business practice, I would have detected just a whiff of fear. Like a bloodhound catching a scent, that should have been enough to stop me in my tracks and begin digging for where that catabolic emotion was coming from.

But I had ignored that emotional guidance because I had heard other coaches talk about similar business practices. On the surface it seemed to meet my values, so I just plugged the policy in without examining it. This is easy to do because we generally assume that everyone else knows better than we do, which in itself is a limiting belief. Even expert advice may not be right for you.

If we take the time to examine—and question—our thoughts and beliefs we can discover weaknesses. Much like you can’t keep doing the same physical exercise the same way forever and expect to continue to get the same results, you have to look for beliefs that are no longer working and reach for new thoughts that better help you move forward.

And finally, you can talk to a coach who can help point out those thoughts and beliefs that you’ve accepted as true for so long that you don’t even recognize that they are actually hindering your progress in becoming the best possible version of you.

What can you do today to pay attention to your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs and make sure they’re strong, well-developed, in alignment with your core values, and are taking you in the direction that will help you meet your goals?

You are not meant to play small. You make yourself small by thinking you are less than you truly are. How you play in life is a choice.

Together we can do it!

Photo by tungphoto / FreeDigitalPhotos.net