Tag Archives: Losing Weight

Feel Fabulous On the Way to Getting the Body You Want

Posted on by
Reply

HappyOften when we set the New Year’s resolution to lose weight, the underlying thought behind the goal is, “I will be happy when I am slim.”

But it’s backwards. You have to start feeling happy now.

As much as possible, feel the emotion that you think being slim will give you. Feeling that emotion right now will actually help turbocharge your efforts to get the body you want.

And it will make the process of releasing the weight fun. (Yes, it really is possible to enjoy getting the body you want!)

It was a huge change for me when I shifted my thinking from, “I will be happy when I lose weight,” to “I will be happy now and enjoy the process of releasing my weight.”

Huge not in that making this shift was difficult, but huge in the impact it had on my life.

One way to make this shift is to think about how being at your ideal weight would make you feel.

Will losing weight make you feel confident? Empowered? Sexy?

This emotion is key. It is this emotion that you are truly after. You just think that losing weight is the route to getting that emotion.

One reason tapping into that emotion is so powerful is because you harness all of your energy in the present instead of siphoning it off to some future time or event.

Shifting your energy from the future to now is like going from driving with bald tires in the snow to having snow tires, chains, and all-wheel drive. It gives you traction, power, and momentum to reach your goals. 

How awesome is it that you can feel the way being slim would make you feel right away (you don’t have to wait!), AND feeling that way will help you get the body you want?

So how do you do that?

Think about times when you do feel confident, empowered, or sexy. If you can’t bring anything to mind, just imagine what having the body you want would feel like. And if you catch yourself feeling confident, empowered, or sexy, make that feeling last as long as possible by reaching for thoughts that build on that emotion.

Now practice this feeling as much as possible every day. Even feeling it for as little as 1 minute will start to move you in the direction you want to go.

Not only do you get the bonus of feeling good right now, but the process of releasing the weight becomes fun and satisfying. Best of all, you keep the weight off for good.

This time next year you can feel physically fabulous and fully love your body.

Decide right now to reach for how being slim will make you feel. And practice that every day.

Together we can do it!

Wellness Tip of the Day

Aside

Wellness Tip of the Day

Will losing weight make you feel confident? Empowered? Sexy? Feel that way right now and boost your weight loss efforts.

banner4

My blog is moving! To keep following my posts after January 15, follow my new blog, at LoveYourWaySlim.com. I look forward to continuing the journey with you!

3 Easy Tips to Create a Slimmer You in 2013

Posted on by
6

ScaleOver this holiday week, you may have found yourself eating, and eating, and eating!

And you may be beating yourself up about it.

But telling yourself how horrible you are truly is NOT helpful—and it could very well end up making you feel so bad about yourself that you unknowingly sabotage your future efforts to lose weight. 

It will probably go something like this:

You feel fat. You may even feel desperate to lose weight. Every time you feel how tight your clothes are, all you can think about is how much you hate your body.

You know you need to diet and exercise so that you can drop some weight, but it’s the end of the year, right? Why start now?

You make a New Year’s Resolution to lose weight. You decide that on January 2nd you are going to start dieting and exercising.

Between now and then you keep eating, and eating, and eating. You are trying to cram in every food you love to prepare for months of hunger and deprivation.

You feel bloated, headachy, and slightly sick.

And you hate yourself even more. You feel ashamed that you’ve let your weight get out of hand—again.

On January 2, you force yourself to work out and you start a diet that drastically cuts the amount of food you’ve been eating.

Each day gets harder and harder.

Maybe your diet lasts for a day or two, or for a week or two, or maybe you are even successful at meeting your goal.

And then you feel your control slip.

You just can’t maintain the rigid diet and exercise “rules” you’ve set in place. You’re tired of being hungry. Your tired of feeling deprived. Your tired of feeling like you aren’t fully living your life.

Before you know it, you’ve regained the weight you’ve lost—and then some.

This time next year, you find yourself putting “losing weight” at the top of your list of New Year’s resolutions—again.

It’s time to say, “ENOUGH!”

There is another way! And you don’t have to follow rigid rules, feel hungry and deprived to get the body you want. (Honestly!)

The first tip  is to ease up on the self-criticism.

This makes sense when you think about the the foundation principle that Energy Attracts Like Energy (also known at the Law of Attraction).

If you spend all your time thinking about the fact that you don’t have the body you want, you are actually creating more life experiences where you are unhappy with your body.

Begin using this Universal Law to work for you instead of against you! 

Start today by focusing on what you can appreciate about your body. By focusing on what is working and what you do like, you will create more opportunities to appreciate and love your body.

The second tip  is to ease up (just slightly!) on the food intake.

This is not the last time you will be able to eat your favorite foods. (I promise!) When you take off the pressure of “never being able to eat this again!” there is not the frenzy to shove everything in now before the “diet deadline.”

Eat what actually feels good. What you really want in this moment. What you can really savor.

There is more than enough. There is plenty. You can still eat your favorite foods AND lose weight. 

Taking the self-imposed pressure off means you will eat less, enjoy more, and start the year maybe not quite as heavy and physically hung-over as you would be otherwise.

You will feel better and have some momentum going on January 2, so beginning to implement some healthier eating doesn’t come as such a shock to your system.

The third tip is to take baby steps.

If going to the extreme of implementing rigid rules and drastically reduced calories is going to make you feel deprived and resentful—and ultimately send your efforts to create the body you want on the skids—then why go that route?

What if instead you committed to eating a little bit healthier today? Or getting in a 10 minute walktoday? And you celebrated what you did, instead of what you didn’t do? Would making that same commitment be a little easier tomorrow? What would your wellness journey look like next week? Next month? In six months?

“A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.”

Lao-tzu, Chinese philosopher (604 BC – 531 BC)

What step are you willing to take on your wellness journey today?

When you just keep taking those small steps, it’s not too much time before you have achieved your New Year’s Resolution and have created the body—and lifestyle—you want!

Together we can do it!

I’m offering a FREE tele-class to help you revolutionize your weight-loss resolution (so it finally works)!

Transform Your New Year’s Resolution

to Lose Weight!

Make 2013 the Year

You Finally Get the Body You Want  

 

January 2, 2013, 8 p.m. USA Eastern

In this content-rich seminar you’ll discover:

  • The Top 5 Ways You are Unknowingly Sabotaging Your Efforts to Lose Weight
  • Why Your Weight is Still a Struggle for You and How to Break the Rebound Weight-gain Cycle Once and For All
  • The Surprising Power You Have to Successfully Lose Weight and Improve the Life of You and Your Family
  • 3 Easy Tips to Transform Your New Year’s Resolution and Turn it into a Reality
  • An Exciting NEW Opportunity to “Love Your Way Slim”
  • Plus Much More…

Simply register by filling out the form at loveyourwayslim.com/transformyourresolution/ and you’ll receive access to this free call.

 

The Three P’s of Change

Posted on by
4

Last year at this time, I was preparing to undergo a full hysterectomy. I came through the surgery beautifully, and thought I would share some of what helped make that challenge such a wonderful opportunity.

 

I was thinking this morning about what it will take for me to rebound from my surgery next week.

What it boils down to is Persistence, Practice, and Patience.

These 3 P’s of Change are true regardless of whether you’re recovering from surgery or illness, working to lose weight, or making some other life change.

Persistence

When you’re finally ready to make a change, you may want it to happen right now.

That impatience makes the process very frustrating and fraught with ups and downs. At the very least, this can make the journey unpleasant, and worse can cause you to get so discouraged that you give up on achieving your goal.

Being Persistent is key.

Persistence is mostly a mind thing. It’s being determined in the moment to make the decision that will move you towards your goal, rather than choosing the option that will maintain you where you are, or even set you back.

After my surgery, I will need to consistently make the decision to eat healthy foods to give my body the nutrients it needs to heal and recover—and not fall into comforting myself with holiday treats. And I will need to move as much as I can. Not only does the doctor say that walking will speed my recovery, but consistently doing what I can will help keep me in the exercise habit so as I am feeling better it will be easier to motivate myself to get moving.

Practice 

There are typically some routine actions that have to be Practiced consistently to facilitate making a change.

For instance, if you’re losing weight, you have to practice eating healthy foods in moderate amounts and moving your body.

There are things you can do to facilitate these regular practices.

If you’re dieting, you can plan your meals for the week so that you have the right food on hand, stick to a schedule of regular eating, and stay on track with calories.

The actions that I want to practice to facilitate my recovery include meditating, eating nutritious meals, walking, and resting.

To facilitate these, I intend to maintain my practice of meditating upon waking. For the past several weeks, my husband and I have made big batches of healthy soups and frozen much of it so that we’ll have easy, nutritious meals on hand. This weekend I also plan to lay in lots of fruit, fat-free Greek yogurt, and other healthy snacks that don’t require any preparation.

Apparently they will get me up for my first walk while I am in the hospital, so I have set some minimum goals for myself for walking on the treadmill when I get home. And certainly I plan to enjoy a lot of naps, reading, and movies.

Patience

The biggest gift you can give yourself when making changes is Patience.

You need to make peace with the fact that change will not happen overnight. And you may make decisions in the moment that aren’t the best, or you may miss an opportunity to practice some of the actions you set for yourself.

This is normal!

One of Bill Phillips’ mantras in his book, “Transformation,” is “progress not perfection.”

Change is about consistency, not being perfect. The quicker you can forgive yourself, the faster you can get back on track.

There are a lot of unknowns about how I’m going to feel after my surgery next Wednesday. Perhaps Thursday I’ll need to sleep all day and I won’t get my planned walk in, or the only thing I’ll feel like eating is toast. That’s OK. While I want to push myself to do those things that will help me recovery quickly, I’m also going to be sensible about it and listen to my body.

Over the weeks of my recovery, I plan to eat some of the lasagna a friend has promised to bring over and I will allow myself to enjoy some holiday treats—in moderation—and I’m not going to beat myself up about it. I am going to strive for consistency, not perfection. By not holding myself to an impossible standard, I’m much more likely to be successful in the long run.

Where could the changes you’re making—or plan to make—stand to have some Persistence, Practice, or Patience?

How could using the three P’s make a difference in your success?

Together we can do it!

 

Focus on the Body You Want

Posted on by
3

I recently watched a woman grab her stomach and say, “This is why I want to lose weight.”

Of course that’s an obvious reason. And it’s extremely helpful to get clear on what you don’t want so you can figure out what you do want.

But what trips so many women up is they stay focused on what they don’t want.

This is a key reason so many women struggle to lose weight—and to keep it off.

Here’s why.

You’re fighting the laws of the Universe.

This makes sense when you think about the Foundation Principle that “Energy Attracts Like Energy,” also known as the Law of Attraction.

When you are focused on the fat, angry about the fat, desperate to get rid of the fat—you are stuck in the energy of fat. Ultimately you are attracting more opportunities to be focused on, angry about, and desperate to get rid of fat.

At its simplest, you get what you focus on—whether you want it or not.

Because you carry your body with you wherever you go, it can make it extremely difficult to shift your thoughts about your body from what is to what you want.

  • You are faced with “what is” every time you dress.
  • You are faced with “what is” every time you look in the mirror.
  • You are faced with “what is” every time you see someone who has what you don’t.

Is it any wonder so many women struggle with their weight?

How do you begin focusing more on what you want rather than what you don’t? More on what you like rather than what you hate? More on what you judge to be good rather than bad?

While it may seem counter-intuitive, accepting where you are is one of the fastest ways to accomplish your goals.

It may feel like letting go of the struggle and the discomfort of where you are will leave you content with a situation or condition you really want to change.

This is especially true with losing weight. There can be a lot of fear around accepting your current body weight, shape, and condition.

Calories count, right, so won’t you just go and eat everything in sight if you accept where you are?

Without that desperate desire to change, where’s the motivation to get up in the morning to work out?

Doesn’t losing weight require constant control and discipline, and you’re a slacker if you slip up?

But if you want the Law of Attraction to work for you, ease up on the negative catabolic energy that is truly holding you in your current condition.

Letting go of the fight, self-criticism, and the desire to have the end result right now acts like a release valve for all that pent-up catabolic energy.

It enables you to shift the momentum you have generated that is moving you towards what you don’t want, so that you can begin to move towards the body you do want.

When you ease up on yourself and put down the verbal lash, you can begin:

  • Focusing on the reasons you want to make a change
  • Envisioning the body that you do want
  • Celebrating each tiny step that you make towards achieving your goals

The more you surrender and focus on your success, the more you build positive momentum that will be like a tidal wave moving you towards your goal. With that momentum, the actions you take become easier and have more impact.

And you feel excited and inspired, which are your indications that you are working with the laws of the Universe rather than against them.

What can you do today to accept that you are where you are? When you feel a sense of relief, you will know you will have successfully hit the energetic release valve and will more easily move towards your goals.

Together we can do it!

I’m excited to announce that I have 3 coaching spaces open to help you love your way slim. If you are serious about transforming your mind and body, secure your spot now by emailing me at hannagoss@goss-coaching.com by November 11 to schedule your complimentary breakthrough session. These powerful sessions are available on a limited basis. Don’t wait till Jan 2 to take inspired action. Start creating the body—and life—you want today.

Take Responsibility and Take Back Your Power

Posted on by
8

I had to give myself some tough love yesterday.

In the hubbub of trying to get out of town, my purse got left behind. I very much wanted to blame this on my husband who was gathering up the bags while I dealt with the dogs, one of whom had been in a state of anxiety for 24 hours because of storms leaving me with little sleep.

In truth, at first I did blame it on David after our friends called to tell us it was still on the kitchen table when we were already an hour down the road.

But the cranky, whiplash-fast response I had didn’t feel good because he’s not responsible for my purse—or my life. I am.

I’m not surprised that this came up for me to deal with head on, because I’d bristled at him just the day before when he playfully brought up another time during a trip that I left my purse behind at a restaurant. I didn’t like the reminder of my thoughtlessness and the resulting consequences—not only for myself, but for other people.

Doing this again was an opportunity to remember that I create my life and have responsibility for meeting my goals to be intentional, constant, and clear.

It’s a lot easier to blame others when things aren’t going right for us. Common excuses I hear about losing weight are, “If my boss didn’t make my job so stressful, I wouldn’t eat so much.” “The rest of my family wants to eat junk food, so I have to eat it, too.” “My spouse makes me so angry, the only way I can calm down is to eat.”

While these things may very well be true, shifting the blame to anyone or anything else makes you the victim—of others, situations, even the world. When you are in catabolic victim energy, you have no power to create the life of our dreams. It makes you blind to the path forward—even if it’s right in front of you—and zaps your energy for taking any step towards where you want to go.

Being the victim lets us off the hook. You don’t have to do better, try harder, or make any changes because everyone else needs to change first.

But you will never create the life of your dreams if you are waiting for anyone else to change. To truly change your life, you have to take responsibility for how you show up, respond, and the actions that you take.

Once again I have been presented with the evidence that I am not being as mindful as I want, that I’m using excuses for not being the best possible version of me, and I’m not owning up to the fact that is so obvious to everyone else—I’m not perfect.

If I shunt the responsibility for this onto David, I lose the opportunity to use this as a reminder of how much I want to be present in my life, to learn from this experience so I can make different choices next time, and to share this with you fabulous readers to remind you that nobody is perfect and that we are all growing and evolving every moment of every day.

What can you do to take responsibility for a task, situation, or event today and make a different choice for how you respond? How does taking responsibility empower you? How do you see yourself differently as a result?

To create the life of your dreams let go of blaming others and take responsibility for everything that happens. See everything as an opportunity to move towards the best possible version of you.

Together we can do it!

Here’s another blogger’s view on taking responsibility: Lose the Excuses by Living4Bliss

Photo by duron123 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Take One Small Step

Posted on by
4

How are those New Year’s Resolutions coming? Are you still plugging away or have they been put aside to show up on next year’s list?

One of the things that can cause people to pass on meeting their wellness goals is the overwhelming feeling that can come from trying to go from chip-eating coach potato to food-measuring athlete all at once.

There really is no rule that says you have to change all of your behaviors at once to succeed.

I didn’t.

Three years ago, for various reasons I went from a runner to a walker to not doing any exercise at all. During that period of inactivity, I didn’t curb my eating and pretty quickly reached my heaviest weight ever.

I found myself starting over with exercise and losing weight—again. And it didn’t feel good.

It actually took some mental preparation and the support of a friend to overcome the inertia to get out of bed and start exercising. At first, all I did was walk. I didn’t even look at my diet. I just focused on getting out of bed every morning and moving. That is what I counted and celebrated as success.

To begin, I set a minimum goal of 10 minutes a day, and then I went up to two hours a week. Slowly and steadily, I increased my exercise goals until I was back up to a fitness level that felt good. By then, I had only lost 5 pounds and I knew it was time to take on the eating.

And even that was a process of cutting back on portions and making better and better choices. Heck, I’m still looking for ways to eat cleaner and healthier. (If you had told me three years ago that I had to drink protein shakes with spinach in them, I would have quit in in horror. Now that’s something I want to do, but it was something I had to build up to.)

Yes, it took me a year to lose 34 pounds and get back into great shape. But at the end of that year I was a lot happier having slowly and steadily made those small decisions towards a healthier lifestyle than to try to do too much at once and give up, only to be faced with the same goal and results a year later.

What small decision can you make today that will move you towards a healthier lifestyle? Do that for a week and then look for another tiny step to make. Do that consistently and you will build momentum and achieve your goals. Do that consistently and next January 1 you will be celebrating your success rather than being faced with the daunting decision to start over once again.

Together we can do it!

Photo by anankkml / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Redirect Your Thoughts

Posted on by
2

While I had an awesome weekend of coach training and connecting with friends and family, the mental and emotional intensity and the late hours left me mentally and physically tired.

When I’m tired, it’s easier to sabotage my thoughts, which lead to feelings that inspire actions that don’t support my goals.

For instance, when I got home Monday afternoon, I discovered that my husband had made Chocolate Chip Cookies while I was gone, which lead to a mental debate about eating some. In the end, I totally rationalized my decision to eat three cookies after dinner.

That’s not that big a deal, right? It’s not the end of the world, or my diet. No long-term damage was done.

But if I don’t make myself aware of those mental processes that lead to eating the cookies and let that line of thinking become a pattern, then I will consistently make choices that don’t support my goals.

Left unchecked, that line of mental reasoning can become so ingrained that when I’m trying to change my actions, it can seem like my hand is involuntarily reaching into the bag of cookies and moving them to my mouth.

If you’ve ever felt like your eating was out of your control, just know that’s a sign that you have some long-term habitual thinking going on that does not support your new goals.

If you can, try to document those unsupportive thoughts. They might be something like:

  • I’m tired and I deserve a treat.
  • It’s too hard to lose weight or eat healthy foods.
  • I’m never going to reach my goal.

Then redirect those thoughts so they’re more supportive. For instance:

  • What I really deserve is to be fit, strong, and lean. I have more energy and feel better when I eat healthy foods.
  • How I look and feel when I am eating healthy foods and losing weight is worth the extra time and energy to prepare the food and stick to my goals.
  • Slowly making progress means I’m more likely to maintain my results. Any progress means I’m moving towards my goals.

But in reality, we may be so out of touch with our thinking that we honestly aren’t aware of those sabotaging thoughts. Or we have so many thoughts racing through our head, it feels impossible to catch them as they’re happening.

If that’s the case, it’s a lot easier to catch the emotion. Negative catabolic emotion always is letting you know that your thoughts aren’t supporting Who you truly are.

Pay attention to how you are feeling when you are reaching for that bag of cookies. Notice how you are feeling when you contemplate skipping your workout. Jot down how you are feeling when you don’t want to get up and prep your food for the next day.

You don’t have to know the thoughts that lead to that feeling to create more anabolic supportive thoughts. Even if you can’t do it in the moment, go back later and create supportive thoughts that you can reach for the next time you are in that situation.

When you are coming at it from the emotional side, it’s helpful to write down these new supportive thoughts, and read and practice them daily so they are easier to grab hold of when you feel yourself sliding into emotion that is leading towards the action of comforting yourself with food.

You can use the process of redirecting your thoughts to reach any goal. Notice how you feel when you have successfully navigated the mental and emotional obstacles and are that much closer to success.

Use that new positive anabolic emotion to motivate yourself to keep reaching for more and more supportive thoughts. You can truly change your life by changing the thoughts, feelings, and beliefs that lead to your actions.

Together we can do it!

 

 

Photo by xedos4 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

 

The Three P’s of Change

Posted on by
8

I was thinking this morning about what it will take for me to rebound from my surgery next week. What it boiled down to was Persistence, Practice, and Patience.

I realized this is true regardless of whether you’re recovering from surgery or illness, working to lose weight, starting a new business venture, or making some other life change.

When we’re finally ready to make a change, we often want it to happen right now. That makes the process very frustrating and fraught with ups and downs. At the very least, this can make the journey unpleasant, and worse can cause us to get so discouraged that we give up on achieving our goal.

So being Persistent is key. Persistence is mostly a mind thing. It’s being determined in the moment to make the decision that will move you towards your goal, rather than choosing the option that will maintain you where you are, or even set you back.

After my surgery, I will need to consistently make the decision to eat healthy foods to give my body the nutrients it needs to heal and recover—and not fall into comforting myself with holiday treats. And I will need to move as much as I can. Not only does the doctor say that walking will speed my recovery, but consistently doing what I can will help keep me in the exercise habit so as I am feeling better it will be easier to motivate myself to get moving.

There are typically some routine actions that have to be Practiced consistently to facilitate making a change. For instance, if we are going to take better care of our teeth we have to consistently practice flossing and brushing morning and night. If we’re losing weight, we have to practice eating healthy foods in moderate amounts and exercising. If we’re starting a new business, we have to practice good bookkeeping and customer service.

There are things we can do to facilitate these regular practices. If we’re dieting we can plan our meals for the week so that we have the right food on hand, stick to a schedule of regular eating, and stay on track with calories. For starting a business we can block out the same time every week and devote it to bookkeeping.

The actions that I want to practice to facilitate my recovery include meditating, eating nutritious meals, walking, and resting.

To facilitate these, I intend to maintain my practice of meditating upon waking. For the past several weeks, my husband and I have made big batches of healthy soups and frozen much of it so that we’ll have easy, nutritious meals on hand. This weekend I also plan to lay in lots of fruit, Greek yogurt, and other healthy snacks that don’t require any preparation.

Apparently they will get me up for my first walk while I am in the hospital, so I have set some minimum goals for myself for walking on the treadmill when I get home. And certainly I plan to enjoy a lot of naps, reading, and movies.

The biggest gift we can give ourselves when making changes is Patience. We need to make peace with the fact that change will not happen overnight. And we may make decisions in the moment that aren’t the best, or we may miss an opportunity to practice some of the actions we set for ourselves. This is normal! One of Bill Phillips’ mantras in his book, “Transformation,” is “progress not perfection.” Change is about consistency, not being perfect. The quicker we can forgive ourselves, the faster we can get back on track.

There are a lot of unknowns about how I’m going to feel after my surgery next Wednesday. Perhaps Thursday I’ll need to sleep all day and I won’t get my planned walk in, or the only thing I’ll feel like eating is toast. That’s OK. While I want to push myself to do those things that will help me recovery quickly, I’m also going to be sensible about it and listen to my body.

Over the weeks of my recovery, I plan to eat some of the lasagna a friend has promised to bring over and I will allow myself to enjoy some holiday treats—in moderation—and I’m not going to beat myself up about it. I am going to strive for consistency, not perfection. By not holding myself to an impossible standard, I’m much more likely to be successful in the long run.

Where could the changes you’re making—or plan to make—stand to have some Persistence, Practice, or Patience? How could using the three P’s make a difference in your success?

Together we can do it!

Shifting My Thoughts about Surgery

Posted on by
16

Even though I am 100 percent confident in my decision to get spade next week, I woke up in the night with some anxiety.

And it wasn’t over my disappointment that the doctor (human vet?) says I can’t get microchipped at the same time. (Some silly thing about them not doing that to people. I think it would have been really handy to not have to carry ID anymore.)

When I asked myself what I was really afraid of, what came up was the probability of pain and discomfort—particularly immediately before and after the procedure, the unknown aspect of how quickly I will be able to bounce back, and the dread of not being able to work out and gaining weight as a result.

I think it’s pretty normal for this type of anxiety to come up before surgery, particularly since my experience with these types of medical procedures is limited to a tonsillectomy when I was 16 and an outpatient procedure I had five years ago to try to address the fibroid tumor in my uterus that is now requiring a hysterectomy.

The good news is that every woman I know who has undergone this operation (including my mother and many fabulous readers) has pretty much agreed that it was one of the best decisions they ever made.

Other than the fear of judgment I felt over sharing the news with my readers, this is the first anxiety I’ve had since August when I made the decision to follow my doctor’s advice to get surgery. It makes sense that it would come up now, as it’s starting to feel real.

It’s close enough that it’s beginning to impact my daily decisions—I unthinkingly scheduled a coaching appointment for two days after the surgery, and then later realized that I might not be up for it. I’ve had my pre-surgery appointment with the doctor and have two disinfecting sponges on my bureau that I’m supposed to bath with before the surgery, and the fleece lounge-wear that I ordered to wear home from the hospital has arrived. (While it makes me look like a small, and extremely fuzzy black bear it is warm and shouldn’t bind any sensitive flesh.)

Often times, even when we’re incredibly confident in our decisions, it’s following through with them that is the most challenging part. It can make us question our original decision, create stress, anxiety, depression, and fear, and lead us to backtrack.

This is true whether you are up for surgery, trying to lose weight, just left a job, or just broke up with someone.

Recognizing that it’s perfectly normal for your Gremlin—that part of you that criticizes and tells you that you are less than who you really are—to kick in is a big help in following through with confidence.

As is recognizing that some of the things you are afraid of are true.

For me, there will be discomfort with this procedure. That 23 hours I am in the hospital will be unpleasant. But the more I dwell on and fight against that, the worse the experience will actually be—and I’m prolonging the discomfort of that experience by a week-and-a-half if I focus on the negative part.

Now I’m not denying it—that anxiety is there and I’m allowing myself to feel and acknowledge it—but I have the power to shift how I think about it, or if need be, to change the subject altogether to something more positive.

For instance, using humor (at least the idea that I’m getting spade is funny to me) is one way I’m relieving the anxiety. Reminding myself of why I’m making the decision and the long-term benefits helps shift my energy. Plus, the worst will be over in 23-hours, which really isn’t that much time in the context of my entire life. I can endure a lot knowing that the worst will be over in a day.

There is also the time I get to take off and the quiet and relaxed Christmas I will have. Giving myself permission to use that time to take care of myself helps take some of the pressure off. I’m also mentally prepared to get back on the exercise wagon as soon as possible. My doctor says the best thing I can do to recover is walk and drink water, so I am poised to do as much of that as I can. I have faith in my ability to make the daily decisions that will gently move me back into my exercise routine. Even if I gain a few pounds, I know what to do to lose it.

The holidays themselves will distract me—Christmas movies, presents, eating in moderation. There will be lots of things to appreciate about my recovery time. And, if I get to even some of the things I have on my to-do list, that will be progress.

Good ways to strengthen your faith in your ability to make decisions is to stay focused on your goal, think through the steps you will have to take and accept that some of them won’t be pleasant, give yourself kudos when you make progress, and forgive yourself when you feel like you have fallen short. Then get up again and keep going.

Knowing you are on the right path doesn’t mean it will be easy. Sometimes the way to the most magnificent places requires maneuvering through steep and rugged terrain. It can even get so rocky that you can lose sight of the path. This is a normal part of the journey.

Together we can do it!