Ease Up for Ultimate Control

I woke up this morning to a gentle rain falling. My husband is out of town, and the animals are extra-loving and the house is quiet. So I took time to sleep-in, meditate, and relax.

The past couple of weeks have been powerful and full of opportunities, and I’ve experienced a lot of change and growth. I also have a lot on my to-do list—much of it things I really want to do and all of it I want done right now.

One of my biggest opportunities has been to practice what I preach about self-care. And a big part of self-care is listening to your body.

It’s easy for me to get caught around the axil of being goal-driven, eating prescribed meals at certain times, and doing my planned intense exercise—no matter what.

While that serves me most of the time, and I think is generally good practice, there are times when what my body (and mind!) really needs is a little kindness, to be treated gently, to be allowed to rest.

After all, if you are driving your car under wet or difficult conditions, the solution for more control is to ease up on the gas pedal, not slam your foot down.

When I don’t listen and ease up, my body will usually alert me to the need with increasing pain, which I’ve been experiencing in my knees and shoulder. If I continue to not listen, I’ll very likely wind up with an injury that will force me to rest.

Having experienced this in the past, I’m working on being more mindful and listening to my body before it gets to that breaking point.

This week, that’s looked like more sleep, easy and gentle movement, and still healthy but less rigid eating.

While my body is experiencing some relief that is letting me know this week of rest was needed, there is a part of me that is afraid if I let up on the intensity at all I will slide back into old patterns, lose the progress that I have made, and once again struggle with my weight.

It is the fear that by easing up at all, I will lose all control and before I know it, I’ll be back at square one.

Just articulating that fear feels like relief.

So I’ll ask myself what I might ask a client.

How reasonable is that fear?

I am a different person now than I even was yesterday, much less two to three years ago. I’ve come a long way, baby! Over the past three years, I’ve not only released the weight, I’ve maintained my new svelte figure. That is evidence of a new and different me.

While there is always the chance that I could fall back into old patterns, it’s not very likely. I know more. I am more. If my weight started creeping up, I would know exactly what to do about it and have lots more emotional and spiritual tools in my toolbox that would help. Plus, I’m learning more every day.

And let’s say the worst did happen, and I didn’t get back on track and I refound the weight. Looking back, I now see that my struggles with my weight were perfect for me and were important to helping me get where I am now. It has been key to my ability to relate to so many other women, to find the missing link that causes 90 percent of diets to fail, and to fully see the beauty and magnificence inside every woman.

If I were to go through the up and down again, wouldn’t there be an amazing opportunity for me to grow and become even more, and to be of even greater service to others?

Absolutely.

So today, I’m going to continue my self-care. I will do gentle and easy movement. I will reach for foods that feel like my body is asking for. I will do work if that feels fun, or I will rest or read if that feels more needed. I will meet up with friends at a book signing and for dinner tonight, and I will be present and loving, and allow us all to be exactly where we are.

And tomorrow, I will evaluate where I am and what my body feels like it needs. And I’ll look forward to continuing to feel strong, fit, and lean.

What do you need to do for your own self-care today? How can you balance your goals with the messages you are getting from your body? What are your indications that it’s time to push and move forward, or that it’s time to ease up and rest? What difference does that make to living the life of your dreams?

Together we can do it!

Photo from www.freedigitalphotos.net

Time for Self-Respect

While I’m away at coach training for a few days, I’m running a few of my favorite blogs that you may have missed.

An old boss of mine had a sign on his door that read, “The floggings will continue until morale improves.”

It was a joke, of course. But how often do we try to motivate ourselves with the whip of internal insults, slurs, and condemnations?

Does telling yourself that you’re “ugly, fat, stupid, and lazy,” really make you want to get up and do your workout, or forgo the potato chips?

If spoken aloud, many people’s internal dialogues might be deemed verbal abuse. Sometimes this abuse can go on practically nonstop, every day. What do you think this does to that person’s self-esteem and belief that they can achieve their goals?

Pushing through this line of thinking to create action takes incredible energy and strength, much like rolling a boulder up a hill. And while progress can be made, without changing our underlying thoughts, emotions, and beliefs, one moment of mental fatigue or flagging self-discipline may result in our watching that boulder roll back down the hill, and our not only regaining all the weight we lost, but then some.

Changing our thoughts, emotions, and beliefs about ourselves, what we want, and our ability to achieve it helps break us out of this cycle of self-punishment. It creates a boost of momentum that makes our push towards wellness a lot more fun and sustainable.

A general rule of thumb is, “If you wouldn’t say it to a friend, it’s not appropriate to say to yourself.”

Begin treating yourself with the respect you deserve. Focus on all the reasons you do want to move your body and eat healthy foods. Focus on all the things you are doing to move yourself forward. Speak to yourself with kindness and encouragement, and celebrate each small sign of progress.

By doing the internal work along with the external work, you can achieve the life of your dreams.

Together we can do it!

Photo by Suat Eman / FreeDigitalPhotos.net