Wellness Tip of the Day: Shift your thinking from, “I will be happy when I achieve my goal” to “Being happy helps me achieve my goal.”
Wellness Tip of the Day: Expecting results is powerful. How much you hold back on willing to believe you can achieve your goal is how much you will fall short.
Wellness Tip of the Day: Focus on what you did well, and learn from and let go of the rest. Building on small successes generates momentum towards your goal.
While I’m in Charleston, South Carolina, this week participating in and presenting a couple of workshops, I thought I would share a few of my favorite blogs.
This one is from the fabulous Kristin Barton Cuthriell.
- Smile at everyone you meet.
- Write down at least two things that you are grateful for today.
- Do something physical. (Get rid of the excuses. My friend who works out regularly will be running three miles, while my aunt who has had a stroke, will be sitting in a chair doing her foot exercises. One is not more difficult than the other. They both will be pushing themselves appropriately. What can you do?)
- Drink plenty of water.
- Do something nice for someone else. (This does not have to be time-consuming. Sometimes it does not take a whole lot of effort to improve someone else’s day.)
- Plan something that you will look forward to doing. (An evening walk, a dinner out, a vacation.)
- Set and accomplish a goal. (Yes, accomplishing this list definitely counts.)
- When you become upset or frustrated, remember that whatever it is that is bothering you may not matter next year, next month, or even tomorrow.
- Take at least fifteen minutes to do something that you find relaxing. (Observing nature, talking a walk, meditating, taking a warm bath, listening to music….)
Let go of bitterness today and let life in.
Kristin Barton Cuthriell, M.Ed, MSW, LCSW
Kristin is a licensed psychotherapist and educator currently working in private practice, counseling individuals, couples, and families. She utilizes a hope based cognitive behavior approach to therapy and other empirically validated treatments to help individuals suffering from depression, anxiety, relationship issues, and difficult life transitions. Prior to entering the mental health field, Kristin spent a decade teaching first, third, and sixth grades. She received a BA in Education from Virginia Tech and went on to earn her Master’s in Education and her Master’s in Social Work. Kristin also enjoys speaking and writing and is currently working on a book designed to help people live more fulfilling lives.
You can read her blog at http://letlifeinpractices.com/
Wellness Tip of the Day: Focus on the benefits of achieving your goal rather than what “might” go wrong in its pursuit. If it’s worth having, it’s worth risking.
I haven’t been perfect this weekend. While I got all my workouts in, my eating has been a little on the high-calorie side, as is apt to happen when family gathers and we celebrate a birthday—in this instance, my husband’s.
In the past, a splurge like I experienced this weekend would have been enough to derail me. I used to suffer from a severe case of perfectionitis where if I didn’t do my diet and exercise perfectly, I would be so hard on myself that I would give up.
Fortunately, I now have a personal “No Regrets” policy. This gives me the ability to start each day with a fresh opportunity to do the very best I can, and to celebrate those actions that are moving me towards my goal.
Being more tolerant and supportive of myself has helped me lift the “all or nothing” requirement that I used to have for success.
This feeling that you have to do your diet and exercise program perfectly or you’ve “blown it” is very common amongst dieters and is one of the primary reasons that people fail to meet their weight-loss goals.
The good news is that you don’t have to be perfect. If you eat a cookie or two, it’s not the end of your diet. But if you give up then and down a pint of ice cream on top of it—well that’s going to be much harder to recover from and your progress for the week will likely be stymied. Too many weeks with no progress and the motivation to continue seeps away and dies.
If you slip, it’s much better to pick back up right where you are.
One way to do this is to let go of regrets. Those cookies might not have been on your eating plan, but hopefully you enjoyed it, and now it’s over and done. Focus on getting back on track with your next meal.
By creating a personal “No Regrets Policy,” you more easily and consistently move towards the best possible version of you.
What do you need to tell yourself to get back on track immediately after you have been less than perfect? What can you do to be more tolerant and supportive of yourself? What difference does that make in helping you meet your goals?
Together we can do it!
Yesterday’s blog was on figuring out your heart-felt reasons Why you want to achieve your goal. The next step is to decide.
Not only are you deciding how you will proceed, but most importantly you are deciding how intensely you will proceed. The power of your decision behind going after your goals will determine your level of success.
For instance, if you decide, “I think I’m going to lose weight,” that’s the level of commitment you bring to the process. It’s fairly tepid and you may lose a little weight, but chances are you won’t keep it up long-term.
If you decide, “It’s important to me for these reasons to lose X amount of weight,” your commitment will likely be stronger. You may get discouraged or derailed, but you are more likely to meet your goals.
If you decide, “I am going to do whatever it takes to lose X amount of weight and achieve these measurable goals because of these heart-felt reasons,” then your chances of success skyrockets. With this momentum behind you, if you stumble or face a challenge, you are much more likely to pick yourself up and keep going.
What often gets in people’s way is they think decisions are made once. Each moment of every day, you are deciding. You must be aware of these decisions and continually decide to move towards our goal.
Decisions like, “In this moment of this workout, am I going to give it my all, or ease up? Am I going to plan my meals, or am I going chance it? Am I going to eat what is on my plan, or am I going to have a little treat? Am I going to go to bed and get enough rest, or am I going to stay up and watch this movie?”
When a decision is powerfully made, you consistently make the small decisions that move you forward. And it is consistently (not perfectly) moving towards your goals that will help you achieve them.
Some ways to increase the power of your decision are to have a powerful Why, and review it often. Figure out how achieving your goal will make you feel, and strive to feel that way as much as possible. Pay attention to your beliefs about what you can achieve and what you deserve, and reframe them if necessary so that they help you move forward instead of hold you back. Visualize and focus on your goal being yours so completely that you feel as if you already have it.
What are some ways that you can increase the power of your decision? How will you respond if you hit a bump or are less than perfect in your moment-to-moment decisions? How can you let go of any belief other than you can have what you wish to achieve?
Together we can do it!
Photo by nuttakit / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
I actually thought about blowing off my work out completely, or if there was another time of day I could get it in. But after a few minutes of this kind of thinking I returned to my reasons Why I want to exercise and follow my plan. I got up.
Having a powerful reason Why you want to achieve a goal will make a huge difference in doing the necessary actions—even when you don’t feel like it, or there are more immediately attractive options calling to you.
One of my best friends is using inspiring her mother during her recovery from cancer as a reason Why she has decided to run a marathon.
She wrote her mom a beautiful letter outlining how running a marathon and recovering from cancer are similar, and how they will be taking on these tough challenges together. That is such a compelling reason Why. You know that on those mornings it’s tough to get out of bed, my friend will be lacing up her running shoes. And her mom will be, too.
Keeping your reason Why front and center is also important, so that when there is an easier choice to make, you remember and can tap into that inner motivation. I keep my goals taped to my computer screen and review my vision and reasons Why daily.
My friend’s mom is getting that letter framed, and you know looking at it every day will inspire her to keep moving forward with her recovery. The day that my friend runs her marathon, they will both be able to look back to where they started and celebrate how far they have come.
What are the reasons you want to achieve your goal? Include the obvious, such as wanting to look good in a swimsuit if your goal is to lose weight, but dig deeper for that reason that resonates with your heart.
Is it to provide a positive example for your kids? It is to be healthy enough to run and play with your grand-kids? Is it to inspire others? Is it to reclaim your life?
What can you do to keep your heartfelt reasons Why front and center in your mind? How can you tap into that resulting emotion to inspire you to take the necessary actions?
Together we can do it!
I’ve been looking for an opportunity to share this fabulous blog, and a full schedule today is just the reason I needed. Enjoy!
People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing, that’s why we recommend it daily. –Zig Zigler
What can you do to daily motivate yourself?
When I was in college, my friends and I sat and watched Oprah Winfrey wheel a wagon of fat out onto the stage of her television show to illustrate how much weight she had lost. It was at that moment that my girlfriends and I became more determined than ever to get healthy. The kitchen, in the small apartment that we shared, was stocked full of chips, salsa, cheese, and, of course, oodles of noodles, the inexpensive staple that kept many college students alive.
Read more Goal Setting Tips and Daily Motivation.
While I’m away at coach training for a few days, I’m running a few of my favorite blogs that you may have missed.
If you think about it, life would actually get pretty boring if you were perfect. You would never learn anything, get to challenge yourself or grow. It would be as if everything in the world were yellow. And while you may love yellow, you appreciate it so much more if there’s a little blue, pink, or green thrown in for some contrast.
Seeing where you aren’t perfect is an opportunity, and engaging in the process of figuring out what you do want and practicing that is really where life energy flows. It’s where you think new thoughts and gain new perspective. It’s where you sculpt and create the life of your dreams.
This is where the fun is! This is where you are truly engaged in life and evolve in new ways. Let go of the need to be perfect or already at your goal, and just jump into life exactly where you are. What do you want to learn? Where do you want to go? How do you want to grow? Who do you want to be?
Move towards that. Engage in that. Learn everything you can about that. Have fun doing that. When you master that, look around and figure out where you want to expand and grow next. And then go after that.
This is life! This is thriving! This is creating the life of your dreams.
Together we can do it!
Photo by Evgeni Dinev / FreeDigitalPhotos.net