Tag Archives: Belief

A New Thought to Create a New You

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Fruits and Vegetables

“I don’t like vegetables.”

A client said this to me the other day.

I have found that this is a pretty common sentiment among women who have struggled with their weight. You may have a lifetime of evidence that most vegetables are, “Blagh.”

When you go on a diet or try to eat healthier, you may take vegetables like medicine, forcing yourself to eat them. Meal times become something to endure rather to savor. At the very least, those meals are notsoul-satisfying.

And here you are trying to fulfill your resolution to lose weight in January—what many feel is the peak of the winter-vegetable doldrums.

Is it any wonder that so many resolutions fail?

What if you are dealing with a limiting belief? What if you could shift your perspective about vegetables just enough that you could see a path around this obstacle to create the radiantly healthy body you want?

One way to do this is to think about how you could make eating vegetables fun.

This might look like:

  • Trying new recipes
  • Adding a cup of spinach to your smoothie
  • Experimenting with vegetables you’ve never tried before

What if you could prove to yourself that you actually do enjoy vegetables in some form or fashion? Maybe even love some of them? How might that alter your success at releasing the weight–for good?

How often do we limit ourselves because of an opinion, judgment, thought, idea, or past experience that we just assume is absolutely and completely True?

For instance, how many of you have ever heard, “You have to clean your plate because there are starving children somewhere in the world?”

Do you think that’s a limiting belief?

How true is it that your cleaning your plate is going to benefit any of those starving children?

How can that belief actually be harmful to you?

  • Cleaning your plate teaches you to disregard your body’s guidance that it’s had enough.
  • Eating too much food is at the heart of being overweight, which has serious health consequences.
  • People are often concerned about wasting food. Extra food will either go to waste in the garbage or will go to waste in your body. You can either waste it, or you waist it.
  • It contributes to a lack mentality. The feeling that “there isn’t enough so I have to eat more than I need.”

A lot of times, helping people see the flaws in their thinking is enough to help them move beyond it. But changing a long-standing belief system can impact underlying values.

If you’re upset by the idea of not cleaning your plate, what are the values you have that may be being challenged?

  • If it’s wanting to help those in need, what would be a more constructive action than cleaning your plate? Maybe donating to charities that feed the poor?
  • If the value is being sustainable, maybe you’ll want to start a composting system?
  • If it’s really just fear or lack, then maybe you have some work to do about trusting the abundance of the Universe?

Whenever you notice a thought that is holding you back in any way, ask yourself if that thought is still true. Unless it is a Universal Truth—a thought that is true no matter what, no matter who, and no matter when—what is it that you need to do to shift it?

All it takes is challenging those limiting beliefs just enough so that doors open, paths unfold, obstacles disappear, and the solutions become clear.

A new thought truly creates a new you.

Together we can do it!

Time is Running Out!

Join the the Love Your Way Slim Coaching Program today! 

This unique program transforms your mindset, integrates your core values and spiritual beliefs, provides exceptional support, and hones in on the most powerful actions you can take to make releasing the weight not only easy and satisfying—but fun! (Yes, it really is possible!)

FIND OUT MORE HERE

Program closes Saturday. It won’t open again until January 2014!

 

http://loveyourwayslim.com/coaching-program/

Slow and Steady Wins the Weight-Loss Race—For Good!

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RHow are those New Year’s Resolutions to lose weight coming? Are you still plugging away? Can you feel them starting to waiver? Or have they been put aside to show up on next year’s list?

One of the things that can cause people to pass on meeting their wellness goals is the overwhelming feeling that can come from trying to go from holiday-treat-eating coach-potato to food-measuring athlete all at once.

There really is no rule that says you have to change all of your behaviors at once to succeed.

I didn’t.

Four years ago, for various reasons I went from a runner to a walker to not doing any exercise at all. During that period of inactivity, I didn’t curb my eating and pretty quickly reached my heaviest weightever.

I found myself starting over with exercise and losing weight—again. And it did NOT feel good.

While I hated where I was, I just couldn’t seem to find the energy to get out of bed and move.

So what changed? How did I get going?

I first started mentally preparing.

These mental preparations did include mentally visualizing me moving my body, but most importantly,they were a conscious effort to change my thoughts, feelings, and beliefs.

You see, I was spending a whole lot of my mental energy feeling like a failure.

Here I was in this place of starting over—again! I knew how to diet and exercise, yet, I had failed. Surly this meant I was a weak person, or a slacker, or was somehow inherently flawed.

Those beliefs were not getting me anywhere. In fact, they were keeping me stuck in the spiral of shame and self-loathing that I thought losing weight would fix. But that very shame and self-loathing made it nearly impossible to force-start a new diet and exercise program.

And I was struggling with thoughts and beliefs about how hard working out was going to be, and how much hunger and deprivation I was going to have to endure. I was dreading it. These kinds of thoughts were NOT conducive to starting a successful diet and exercise program.

It was important to take the time to mentally prepare for where I wanted to go.

Action is great, but if you don’t have your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs aligned behind it, it’s not going to create sustainable results.

Part of that mental preparation was gently letting go of the idea that I was somehow a failure. Was I really? I did know what to do. In fact, I was so mentally disciplined that numerous times I had forcedmyself to push past a wall of negative energy to Make Things Happen.

What mattered was my belief in myself. What mattered was that I knew Who I was and what I could accomplish.

Changing those underlying thoughts brought a sense of relief that was enough to begin to shift the momentum of energy in my favor.

Another part of my mental preparation was to think about all the reasons I did want to be slim, fit, and healthy. To imagine how good that would feel.

I took my reasons a lot deeper than just looking good in a pair of jeans. I wanted to fully live a vibrantand fulfilling life. A part of me felt like I wasn’t living up to my full potential. I wasn’t consistently showing up in relationships as the person I wanted to be.  I wasn’t accomplishing everything I wanted to accomplish. I wasn’t showing up in my life as who I knew I intended.

Having physical health, energy, and stamina was critical to be able to step out as the Me I truly wanted to be.

And the final piece of mental preparation?

I reached out for support. Having someone there to confirm that I wasn’t a failure or a slacker, and to tell me that they “knew I could do it” was what tipped the energetic scale enough that I was able to get out of bed on that chilly morning and move!

But that movement would have been a joke to some people. What I considered a huge success was just 10 minutes of any kind of physical movement. Seriously, I counted everything! Counting and celebrating each tiny sign of success continued to build the energetic momentum towards achieving my goals.

And it wasn’t until I was consistently meeting my physical goals that I started thinking about the slow and steady changes I could make with my eating.

The daily mental preparation continued to be critical to my achieving my success. It was the wind that helped me get airborne and support me as I flew.

It was—and continues to be—the critical factor in how I have easily maintained a size 6 now for the past several years.

Yes, it took me a year to lose 34 pounds and get back into great shape. So what?

At the end of that year I was a lot happier having slowly and steadily made those small decisions towards a healthier lifestyle than to try to do too much at once and give up, only to be faced with the same goal and results a year later.

And now several years later, I can tell you taking it slow and steady was totally worth it!

It was that slow and steady, inside out approach that led to sustainable results.

What small mental shift can you make today that will move you towards a healthier lifestyle? Do that for a week and then look for another tiny step to make. Do that consistently and you will build momentum and achieve your goals.

Do that consistently and next January 1 you will be celebrating your success rather than being faced with the disheartening decision to put Losing Weight on your list of New Year’s Resolutions—again.

Together we can do it!

Don’t Wait Until Next Year to Get the Body You Want!

Join the the Love Your Way Slim Coaching Program today! 

This unique program transforms your mindset, integrates your core values and spiritual beliefs, provides exceptional support, and hones in on the most powerful actions you can take to make releasing the weight not only easy and satisfying—but fun! (Yes, it really is possible!)

FIND OUT MORE HERE

Program closes January 12, 2013. It won’t reopen until January 2014!

http://loveyourwayslim.com/coaching-program/

Change This Limiting Belief Getting in the Way of the Body You Want

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Yesterday, a fabulous reader and friend sent me a comment saying she had shared this blog that I wrote last June with just about everyone in her family. As I prepare for tonight’s kickoff of the Love Your Way Slim Coaching Program, I thought it was worth sharing with the rest of you.

Design Your Future

Question: What does an 86-year-old woman doing an absolutely awesome gymnastic routine, a 74-year-old fitness instructor, and a 100-year-old running a marathon have that you don’t have?

Answer: The belief that they can do it.

Regardless if your goal is to lose 10 or 100 pounds, recover from an illness, or to climb a mountain, at the core of achieving anything is the belief that it is possible.

One of the biggest limiting beliefs that we have as a society is that we decline with age. One way to test if this is true is to look and see if it is a Universal Truth—meaning it is true regardless of who, what, when, or how.

The examples below clearly demonstrate that being in awesome physical shape is possible at any age.

What happens as we age is that we change, but change does not mean decline unless that is how we define it.

Our minds are powerful enough that if you expect to see decline,  you will.  And just about everyonebelieves in this decline and are using all the people who believe it to justify their belief.

Imagine what would be different about your life if you looked for examples of people doing what you want as a reason to believe it can be rather than using everyone else as an excuse not to try?

Another way to shift your beliefs is to reframe the story you have around change. For instance, lots of people think that with age they have to give up running because of the impact it has on their bodies. A reframe might look like:

  • Perhaps this is actually the opportunity to take up another activity—such as biking or yoga—which you are even more passionate about?
  • Perhaps this is the opportunity to train smarter or look into other solutions, such as changing running techniques as described in Chi Running and elsewhere.
  • Perhaps slowing down and walking really helps you connect with Who you are and what you want out of this phase of life?

Only you know what the right reframe would be for you, but creating a new story of what the change of time means opens you up to the possibility of continuing to grow, improve, and evolve—body, mind, and spirit.

How do you want your life to look as you get older? What beliefs are getting in the way of achieving that vision? What can you do today to begin seeing change in a new way?

Together we can do it!

It’s Not Too Late!

Join the the Love Your Way Slim Coaching Program today!  

This unique program transforms your mindset, integrates your core values and spiritual beliefs, and hones in on the most powerful actions you can take to make releasing the weight not only easy and satisfying—but fun! (Yes, it really is possible!)

FIND OUT MORE HERE

Program closes January 12, 2013.

http://loveyourwayslim.com/coaching-program/

Change Your Beliefs to Get the Body You Want

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One of the first indications that that I’m feeling overwhelmed is a tired, fuzzy feeling behind my eyes.

I was feeling this last Sunday at the end of an intensive VIP day with my fabulous coach, Kendra Thornbury, where we laid out my business plan for the year.

When I shared with her that I was feeling overwhelmed, her response provided an “Ah-Ha” moment.

“That is an old belief that this needs to be overwhelming.”

And she was right!

Having a plan of action could have been exciting. It could have provided a sense of relief. It could have given me hope for the future of my business.

As soon as I realized I could choose a different response, I felt my energy shift and that fuzzy feeling drained away.

I had a similar experience later in the middle of the night. Kendra and I had worked through a lot of fear and intense emotions that had come up for me as we put together a plan that would significantly take me out of my comfort zone. And I had a long day of travel the next day that wouldn’t get me home until the wee hours of Tuesday morning.

There was a tickle in my throat and I was worrying about getting sick.

Ding!

I realized this was an old belief I had about the physical impact of releasing intense emotion. As soon as I realized that, again I felt the energy shift and a sense of wellness and well-being returned.

These old limiting beliefs are just thoughts that I have practiced and accepted as true about myself and life.

And everyone has them.

Often you are so used to thinking your limiting beliefs—or they are so prevalent among your family, friends, co-workers, or even society—that you just accept them as true.

If you are like the women I work with, your limiting beliefs are holding you back from getting the body—and life—that you want.

For instance:

  • Do you believe releasing weight is hard and no fun? Limiting belief.
  • Do you believe that you will feel deprived and can’t enjoy the food you love? Limiting belief.
  • Do you believe that you hate exercise? Limiting belief.
  • Do you believe that your body is somehow faulty? Limiting belief.
  • Do you believe you are too old? Limiting belief. (Really! It’s a limiting belief!)

How do you know if it’s a limiting belief?

An easy test is to ask if it’s universally true, meaning it’s true for every person, every time, every place.

And I can tell you from my own experience and from the experience of my clients:

  • The journey of releasing weight—and keeping it off—can not only be profound on so many levels, but can be fun—and yes, even easy.
  • That the healthiest food is often the most delicious, and that you can create a plan that enables you to eat ALL the food you love.
  • That moving your body can be so much fun! Even for you.
  • That your body is working so hard on your behalf.
  • And I know this is challenging to hear. But most people use getting old as an excuse. When you start paying attention, there are a lot of 100-year-olds out there running marathons. If they can do it, so can you!

Be willing to change your beliefs about limitations, and allow yourself to have a different experience.

You will be amazed at how different you feel—and how easily you can create the body you want.

Together we can do it!

Where Are You Headed?

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One of the challenges with creating the body that you want is that you are always carrying the body that you have around with you. It’s a constant reminder that you are where you don’t want to be.

When you think about the Foundation Principle that “Energy Attracts Like Energy,” also known as the Law of Attraction, it makes sense.

Our thoughts are energy. If you are focused on the fat you don’t want, or your lack of fitness or beauty, you will not only attract more thoughts like that, but more circumstances that support those beliefs.

Getting the body you want requires continually tearing your attention away from where you are and focusing more on where you want to be.

Only, this backfires if you don’t believe you can get where you want to be.

So how do you mentally walk this fine line of being in the body you don’t want—and having to look at and experience it all day every day—but not quite believing you can achieve the body you really want? Particularly when you are so used to thinking negative thoughts about your body, you don’t even know you’re doing it?

This is why a coach is so helpful. But ultimately, whether you have a coach or not, you are the one who has to navigate this mental path forward.

So here are some tips:

Pay attention to your emotions. How many thoughts do you think a day? A lot! It will just make you crazy trying to monitor what you’re thinking. Instead, pay attention to how you are feeling. If you’re having negative, catabolic emotions, such as frustration, overwhelment, hopelessness, blame, etc., these should be like signal flares letting you know you are headed where you don’t want to go.

Then you can determine what you were thinking, or better yet, just begin to shift your thoughts in the direction you do want to go. Such as:

“Clearly I’m not where I want to be. But that’s OK. I am where I am. And the good news is I caught myself. That right there is progress. And I am doing a lot right. I’m paying more attention to the food that I’m eating and I’m moving my body more. And I’m noticing that my stamina and energy levels are improving. I feel really good after my workouts, and every day I’m seeing a little bit of progress. I didn’t get where I am overnight and I it will take a little time to get where I want to be, but really, I’ve come a long way. I’ve already lost a few pounds, my clothes are looser, and I’m feeling more confident. With just a little consistency and persistence on my part, I am going to see significant changes. It doesn’t have to happen all at once. I know I can get there.”

Now you should be feeling a sense of relief, which is all you need to feel to let you know you have shifted your energy.

Change the mental subject. When you catch yourself looking in the mirror and being self-critical, find something else to think about that you do feel good about. Maybe it’s another body part that you can praise. Or maybe it’s how much your dog or child makes you laugh. You can even make a list of things that you enjoy, and then read it when you catch yourself heading down the road towards body shame.

Go take a nap. Or meditate. Or even just take three deep breaths. If you catch your catabolic thoughts picking up speed, do what you can in the moment to just to ease your foot off the gas pedal. Slowing the negative momentum will make changing thoughts smoother and easier.

Your thoughts lead your life. Shift your thoughts consistently in the direction you want to go and your body—and life—will follow.

Together we can do it!

 

 

 

Aren’t You Curious?

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I set aside time yesterday to work on my business bookkeeping. In addition to a little bit of procrastination, I found myself starting the project with a small bowl of dark chocolate chips.

And I went back for seconds.

Of course this is not the end of the world and I did get the bookkeeping done, but what both the procrastination and chocolate let me know is that I have some negative, catabolic thoughts, emotions, and beliefs going on that I need to look at.

Whenever your actions and goals aren’t in alignment, it just means there’s some underlying catabolic energy that needs to be addressed. That’s it. It’s not an indication of your strength of character, willpower, or how good a person you are.

And it’s not about the food.

Mentally beating yourself up in these situations is the equivalent of throwing gasoline on a fire. Adding negative self-criticism is literally just making the underlying catabolic energy stronger and giving it more momentum.

It’s best just to step back and observe yourself with curiosity. What’s going on here? What am I thinking? What am I feeling? What do I believe about myself in regards to this situation?

And don’t even try to change your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs in that moment. Remember, you’ve got some energetic momentum built up. Stepping in front of an energetic tidal wave will emotionally pound you into the rocks.

Just watch and let the wave go by. Later, when you’re feeling good and are in a positive, anabolic state of energy, you can revisit the scenario and look at the underlying beliefs. Not only do you gain clarity from this better-feeling place, but you can more powerfully change your thoughts so that the next time you’re better able to align your actions with your goals.

In my situation, I have some lingering limiting beliefs about my math skills that go back to grade school, as well as expectations about how “unfun” bookkeeping is, etc., etc. So here’s how I shifted my thinking after meditating this morning.

The reality is putting my bookkeeping off feels way worse than doing it. And as long as I have a calculator, I’m actually pretty good at it. I have an intuitive sense that enables me to make smart decisions. There’s a part of me that really enjoys seeing the numbers line up. And I see the income I’m making as an indication of the value and service I’m providing my clients. And I love how the income is helping me build my business so I can support and help empower more women. It feels very satisfying to have my books in order and to know exactly how much I have spent and earned. I love the feeling of being on top of things and knowing the ins and outs of my business.

Now, next time I’m sitting down to do my books, I’ll be able to tap into that feeling of satisfaction, enjoyment, and even empowerment, and I’ll be less likely to feel the need to reach for chocolate.

However, because this issue entails some long-standing limiting beliefs, I may have to do this process several times before I am chocolate-free. But each time I do it, I’m shifting the underlying energy to a more positive place.

As I let go of the catabolic feeling of dread around bookkeeping and switch it to a more anabolic feeling of expectation, satisfaction, and even eagerness, not only will I be able to let go of the chocolate, but I’ll have an increase in energy that will enable me to be more productive and engaged in all areas of my life.

The next time you find yourself doing some stress- or emotional-eating, just observe yourself with curiosity. Pay attention to what you are thinking and feeling. Later, when you are feeling better, look at how can you change those beliefs.

Together we can do it!

 

Photo from www.freedigitalphotos.net

 

 

Tips to Increase Your Momentum Towards Meeting Your Goals

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One of the ways I used to trip myself up was to second-guess everything I was doing.

While doing one workout, I was wondering if another might be better. I’d spend a lot of mental energy debating between taking the elevator or stairs, and mentally chastise myself if I ate a protein bar instead of drinking a protein shake.

Being wishy-washy about your decisions—or downright critical—is the mental equivalent of letting the air out of your tires. It is an energetic leak that will slow the success you really want.

While debating your decision when the choices are fairly similar will slow your progress, you will give yourself a flat tire in a second if you choose something you believe is actually harmful.

Negative catabolic thoughts and emotion can literally impact your metabolism and other weight-related systems making it easier to gain and harder to release weight. Actually doing the action you believe to be detrimental—and the resulting guilt, shame, etc.—increases the negative effects.

Remember this the next time you are having a thought such as, “That cake is so fattening. I really shouldn’t eat it.”

This is because every action is preceded by a thought and belief, all of which have energy. Think of each step as increasing your momentum. Aligning the energy of a thought, with the energy of a belief, and energy of the action in the direction of your goal is like a train gaining speed towards your destination. It has the full force of momentum behind it.

The energy of an action that is heading in the opposite direction of your thought or belief is like having a head-on collision. At the very least it’s painful. At worst, it can derail your efforts.

The key is to put all of your support behind your decisions.

You do that by:

  • Being present and committed to what you are doing in the moment. For instance, put all of your energy into the workout you are doing. You can then gauge by the results you are getting if you need to rethink your plan.
  • Making decisions quickly. Don’t waste a lot of energy debating between a protein bar and shake. Pick one and move on.
  • Choosing the option that feels best. There are days it feels good to your body to take the stairs. There are days your body needs a rest and the elevator feels better. Pay attention to how the decision feels, and choose the better feeling option. It’s always the right one.
  • Fully committing to the choice you are making, particularly if they are pretty similar. If grabbing a protein bar helps you get out of the house on time, that’s a great option. Don’t second guess it. You can even boost the power of the decision by being grateful for the option.
  • Getting your thoughts, beliefs, and actions in alignment. If you believe eating any cake on your diet is “bad,” make sure you keep that off your fork. If you really want some cake, how can you feel good about eating it? Perhaps you can align with the idea of having a free meal once a week that will enable you to have a little cake and still meet your goals. Then when you do have some, enjoy it! If you feel guilt afterwards, your thoughts and beliefs aren’t in alignment with your actions.

Pay attention to how you feel. Positive, anabolic emotions such as confidence, contentment, eagerness, etc., are a sign that you are headed towards your goals and are gaining momentum. Negative catabolic emotions such as guilt, deprivation, doubt, etc., are a warning sign that your thoughts and beliefs are headed in the opposite direction of your goals and that you are in danger of not getting where you want to go.

How can you begin to shift your thoughts and beliefs so that they are in alignment with your actions? What difference does that make in meeting your goals?

Together we can do it!

You Can Change the Past

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What came first, the chicken or the egg?

While I don’t have the answer to that one, I can tell you the thought or belief comes before the experience.

If you can accept that as true at least the majority of the time, it can change your life. Even if you are just willing to believe it’s possible and will look at some of your life experiences differently as a result, it can have a profound impact on your happiness—and how well you achieve your goals.

Most people are unwilling to see their past experiences with any other interpretation than the one they gave it in the moment and have been recounting for years. They think, “That experience was hurtful to me. End of story.”

But what if it’s not? What if it’s your very interpretation that is keeping that painful experience alive for you? That is limiting you? That is holding you back from the body and life of your dreams?

Don’t believe me?

I’ll give you an example of how I shifted an interpretation of a painful experience to one that now inspires me and fills me with appreciation.

When I was in the 7th grade, my brother called me “Buffalo Butt.”

Now this is typical older brother stuff, right?

But to me, that nickname was incredibly hurtful. I felt diminished. For many, many years I carried the belief in my heart that my bum was unattractive, unworthy, less than, and that was the painful story I told myself and believed to my core.

But what if you take the emotional pain and judgment out of the picture for a moment and look at the experience as a gauge of where my thoughts and beliefs were before he made the comment?

What if it was my existing low self-esteem and self-critical thoughts that inspired my brother to make that joke? And what if that comment was totally and purely like having a mirror held up to me of what I already had going on in my head?

Now my brother is not someone who is intentionally trying to hurt me. In fact, his reflection back to me of my existing thoughts and beliefs was actually an opportunity for me to get awareness and change my thoughts.

Now I’m no longer the victim. I’m the creator. I’m in the driver seat. I am empowered.

And the beautiful thing is I was still able to take advantage of that opportunity almost 30 years later when I reflected back on that experience with this new perspective.

What a gift his comment was!  At 13, I was completely in the self-critical weeds and his joke was a perfect reflection of what was already going on in my head.

When I take my brother out of the equation, not only do I let go of long-standing grudges against him (which benefits me down to the cellular level, by the way), I can also change my thinking about myself.

Of course I didn’t have an ugly tush at 13. I can recognize the insecurity for what it was and right now, I can give my 13-year-old-self all the love, acceptance, and appreciation that I wanted in the moment. And if my having an ugly behind was not true at 13, then it is not true now. All that’s ever held me back was my own thoughts and beliefs.

And that right there is like I had a time machine and went back and changed that experience. The past is now and forever altered in my mind.

Once I made that shift, the love and appreciation I had for my body surged. And those new thoughts and beliefs are now creating my current—and future experiences.

And I’ve seen my body change as a result.

How can you begin to see those painful past experiences as purely a reflection of where your thoughts and beliefs were in the moment?

Begin to use them as your gauge of how well you are lining up your thoughts and beliefs with your desires. If you aren’t getting the reflection back that you want, know that you have the power to change your thoughts and beliefs and get a different experience–past, present, and future.

Together we can do it!