What You are Doing that’s Keeping You From Slim and Sexy

“I’m doing everything right. Why isn’t my body responding?”

“Being on a diet makes it really hard to enjoy life.”

“I’ve tried everything and nothing works!”

“Losing weight is a struggle every day.”

“I’m so TIRED of being overweight.”

“Why can’t I just have a normal body, and relax and enjoy myself like I see other people do?”

“I’m already working so hard and I’m not seeing any results. I don’t know what else to do.”


These are common statements that I hear women make. They feel frustrated, angry, and often think that their body is somehow faulty and that they are stuck with the body shape they have.

And they desperately want something else. They yearn for a healthy, slim, and sexy body—sometimes more than anything else!

What if it is these very thoughts that are holding you back? What if those feelings of desperation and yearning are like spraying yourself with healthy, slim, and sexy repellent?

It’s possible that may actually make you feel worse. “How can I not feel desperate,” you might ask? “How can I not think dieting is hard when it bloody well is,” you might argue?

This is not meant to make you self-critical, inspire you to explain to me why your situation is different (that just keeps you stuck), or to overwhelm you because you’re already working so hard to “fix it.”

Honestly, I get it. I spent more than 35 years thinking some of those same thoughts and feeling that desperation. I couldn’t get a break. My body was somehow faulty, and actually felt like it was working against me. I tried everything and I couldn’t see any more solutions.

But what I discovered is that I had the solution all along.

What is actually going on here is that you have a pattern of negative thoughts and emotions that are generating catabolic energy.

That’s it. It doesn’t make you a bad person—or a good person for that matter. It doesn’t mean you aren’t doing an exceptional job sticking to your eating and exercise plan, or that you don’t have enough willpower (probably, you have more than most!). It doesn’t mean you aren’t spiritual enough or are too spiritual. And it doesn’t mean there is something wrong with you—or your body.

Now there are a couple of reasons that this pattern of catabolic thought and energy is keeping you stuck exactly where you don’t want to be.

And you have the power to change it. There is no outside force holding or keeping you down. (That’s one of those thoughts that is actually keeping you stuck!)

You have the power! You are strong enough, loved enough, have enough, can do enough, are worthy enough. As soon as you are willing to take the keys, you will begin unlocking the shackles that have kept you from getting the body you want.

It is as simple as deciding that your thoughts and emotions matter. And then slowly, steadily—and gently—practicing new thoughts and reaching for new emotions.

I won’t lie to you. The physical changes won’t happen overnight. But the emotional change can happen in as little as 68 seconds. In just over a minute you can feel a sense of relief. And that shift in energy is enough to begin bringing you the body that you want.

So why are your negative thoughts and emotions literally repelling your healthy, slim, and sexy body?

On a physical level, your negative thoughts and emotions are generating catabolic energy that releases the stress hormone cortisol, adrenaline, and other chemicals that literally strip your body’s vitality at the cellular level. This breaks down your immune system, stresses your heart, and impacts your muscles. Over time, this catabolic energy can cause everything from painful trigger points in your shoulders, to inflammation, to heart attacks. It also impacts your metabolism and other weight-related systems making it easier to gain and harder to release weight.

Catabolic thoughts and emotions also attract more of what you don’t want in life. This is because “Energy Attracts Like Energy” (also known at the Law of Attraction). Being overly focused on where you are—or where you have been—just keeps summoning similar thoughts, feelings, experiences, situations, and people so that your results never seem to change. In fact they can actually continue to spiral downward as you think and feel that the situation is getting worse.

Thoughts and emotions are energy, not marble. You have the power to change them!

You begin by relaxing and easing up on the critical thoughts about your body. (Note: This is a mental process, not an excuse to go eat a pan full of brownies!) To do this:

  • Meditate, journal, or just focus more on how your body is working for you rather than against you.
  • Pay attention to how you feel. Take negative emotion—despair, overwhelment, frustration, anger, blame, etc.—as signals alerting you to the thought pattern you have going on that is not serving you.
  • Ease up on your thinking. That can look like, “I am doing a lot right. I am taking care of my body. I am beneficial to a lot of people, I do have good relationships, and I am connected spiritually and have made lots of progress in my life. And I will figure this out, too. Of course there is room for me to grow and expand in this boundaryless Universe. I love my spiritual connection and love watching it grow and magnify. And there is a lot about my body that is working well. My heart is beating and my blood is pumping and my lungs are breathing in and out. I know that the answers and solutions are there and when I tune into them, they will become clear. I will figure this out. And there is a lot about my body to appreciate. I’m just going to relax and let this go right now.”
  • Focus on all the things you can do, and let go of all the things you can’t.
  • Begin to relax into the idea that this is just where you are right now. It doesn’t mean you will be here forever.
  • Work with a coach to help you sort through your thoughts and get individualized help to break through those blocks that are literally weighing you down.

You absolutely have the power to transform your mind to get the body you want.

What’s one way can you begin shifting your thoughts and emotions? How willing are you to begin practicing that—even for as little as a minute a day? How does that emotional relief enable you to begin moving you towards your goals?

Together we can do it!

Did You Receive the Gift?

When I took the dogs outside for their break yesterday, I was gifted by a single strand of spider’s web that was reflecting the colors of the rainbow. As I stood and watched it blow gently in the breeze, it was like watching a symphony of light as brilliant undulating colors moved up and down in different combinations. All caught on this single silky strand.

It was absolutely and utterly beautiful. And it would have been so easy to miss.

These kinds of moments are gifts from All-That-Is. How you receive them is how you receive life. How you receive life is how you receive everything—including that slim, healthy, and sexy body that you want.

Here’s a quick test to see how open you are to receiving the gifts from All-That-Is (God, the Universe, Source Energy, Higher Coach—whatever works for you).

When someone gives you a compliment, do you:

  • Explain why you don’t deserve it?
  • Explain why it’s a fluke?
  • Discount the value of it?
  • Say “thank you,” but feel uncomfortable?
  • Appreciate that they noticed, that you have that momentary connection, feel your worthiness, and bask in the positive remark?

If it was anything but the last one, you’re basically saying “No” to all the good things that Source is trying to bring into your life; whether it is a moment of exquisite beauty, a compliment from your partner, or the perfect functioning of your body.

Too often, women are so focused on checking off the next thing on their to-do list, are feeling guilty about not getting in their workout or eating something “bad,” or are just generally feeling bad about themselves or angry at others, that they miss those moments of synchronicity, coincidence, happenstance, miracle, chance, luck.

You miss the gifts of life that confirm your connection to the Universe, that are affirmations of how much you are loved and adored, that are the answers to the very questions you have been asking.

The reason is negative thoughts and emotions generate catabolic energy. Even a little bit of catabolic energy has a huge impact on your life.

For example, have you ever walked around with a pebble in your shoe? Even if you were in the most beautiful spot on the planet with mountain or ocean views, fragrant flowers in bloom, and lovely meandering paths, how long were you able to keep going before you had to stop and remove the stone, even if it was tiny?

While you had the stone in your shoe, how much did you focus on the beauty of the day and path, or was much of your attention on the discomfort? How much beauty did you miss being even a little focused on the stone?

Catabolic thoughts, feelings, and beliefs are much like that stone in your shoe. It doesn’t take much for them to distract you from the life you are creating, the joy and opportunities that abound, and the love that surrounds you.

The problem is, as we grew up we were told to “suck it up” and get used to the stones. That negative emotions are “normal” and that “others are responsible for our happiness.” Many don’t even realize they have the ability to shift their thoughts, feelings and beliefs, so they spend most of their time in catabolic energy.

It shows up as stress, dissatisfaction, feeling overwhelmed, angry, and even stuck.

The draining effects of catabolic energy accumulate over time, which literally impacts your body down to the cellular level. It is now common knowledge that stress impacts your health—and makes it easier to gain and harder to release excess weight.

It’s time to begin emptying your shoes of those catabolic stones. It’s time to take responsibility for how your feel, what you focus on and think about, how present you are, and how you receive the gifts of life.

Emmet Fox said the word “salvation” in the Bible means “perfect health, harmony, and freedom.” He also said that this was “the will of God for man.” And I would add women!

How willing are you to look for, acknowledge, and appreciate those subtle but profound gifts today? How willing are you to receive the health, harmony, and freedom that you have been asking for? How willing are you to believe that you deserve them and that your Higher Coach wants you to have them?

Together we can do it!

What Did You Envision?

When you were watching the Olympics, did you notice how many athletes closed their eyes for a few moments before they got into the starting position?

My guess is that they were visualizing the performance they wanted to have.

Visualizing is a powerful technique that is scientifically proven. It makes sense when you realize that thoughts have energy, so aligning your thoughts and your actions builds your momentum for reaching your goals.

But I always struggled with visualizing until I tied it to how I would feel when I achieved my goal. Emotions are easier for me to direct, and they add another little push. Now I have the energy of my thoughts and emotions behind my actions.

You can began practicing this emotional envisioning in various ways.

Before bed, think about how you want to feel as you move through your day—for instance how energized and eager you are to give your workout your all. How much you appreciate the food that you are eating and your amazing body that is knocking itself out on you behalf.

Then as you go through your day, reach for the emotion you envisioned—and then make it even more specific.

For instance, not only reach for feeling energized and eager before your workout, but also think about how good it feel afterwards–it makes you feel alive, confident, successful, even powerful. Spend a moment allowing yourself to feel that way, and then begin moving your body.

Talk about amping up your workout! And an added bonus is it increases the positive feelings you experience when you’re done, so the good feeling just keeps getting better and better!

Feel how you want to experience your meal before you eat. Feel how rested and refreshed you will be when you wake up before you go to sleep. Feel how cleansing and hydrating the water is before you drink.

You are creating a wave of energy that is like a tidal wave moving you where you want to go.

However, if you are in a lot of pain or are struggling with something, trying to envision how it will feel when you meet your ultimate goal may actually make you feel worse because it seems too far away. If that’s the case, just reach for a smaller feeling of relief. For instance, envision waking up feeling a little more rested, or the satisfaction of completing your walk around the block. Your progress is your progress.

What can you do to begin emotionally envisioning how you want your life to go before you live it? What difference does that make to how much more fun life is along the way to reaching your goals?

Together we can do it!


How Much Power are You Giving to the Scale?

Does having your gas gauge in your car read “empty” ruin your whole day? Do you post about it on your blog and tell all your friends what a failure it makes you?

Do you measure the air in your tires, and sit down on the curb and cry because it doesn’t show the number you wanted?

When you figure out the average number of miles you drive on a gallon of gas and it hasn’t’ changed from the day or week before, do you berate yourself with what an awful person you are—and go find comfort in a donut?

Then why are you doing that after you step on the bathroom scale?

Most women that I work with give way too much of their personal power to the scale. In their minds, not only does it measure how well they’ve done sticking to their exercise and eating plans, but it also measures their self-worth.

In truth, neither of these is the case.

The scale is just a tool—and a faulty one at that—that can be used to help you release weight. Using it consistently gives you a general idea of where you are your journey.

It typically does not accurately measure body fat—which is what you really want to know—and because weight is impacted by things like hormones, salt, sleep, etc., etc., it can go up and down for what feels like no reason.

When it becomes the deciding factor in the quality of your day and crashes your self-esteem, it is actually doing you harm. You might as well throw it away. It is holding you back, keeping you stuck, and making the weight stick to you like glue.

This is because the negative emotions you feel after stepping on the scale are generating catabolic energy that releases the stress hormone cortisol, adrenaline, and other chemicals that literally cannibalize your body. They break down your immune system, stress your heart, and impact your muscles. They also impact your metabolism and other weight-related systems making it easier to gain and harder to release weight.

By giving the scale the power to measure your value you are robbing yourself of the immense power you actually do have to get the body you want.

You can reclaim some of that power right now by deciding that you will no longer allow an inanimate object that at best is an inaccurate tool from dictating how you feel.

Until you can step on the scale and feel good about yourself—regardless of what number it reads—you are better off using a measuring tape, fat-measuring calipers, or even how well your jeans fit as your gauge to determine your progress.

Your value as a person is far greater than the number on the scale. And when you align your thoughts, emotions, and beliefs with your actions, you will be amazed at the progress you make.

How can you measure your progress in a way that will help move your towards your goals, rather than hold you back?

Together we can do it!



Tips to Increase Your Momentum Towards Meeting Your Goals

One of the ways I used to trip myself up was to second-guess everything I was doing.

While doing one workout, I was wondering if another might be better. I’d spend a lot of mental energy debating between taking the elevator or stairs, and mentally chastise myself if I ate a protein bar instead of drinking a protein shake.

Being wishy-washy about your decisions—or downright critical—is the mental equivalent of letting the air out of your tires. It is an energetic leak that will slow the success you really want.

While debating your decision when the choices are fairly similar will slow your progress, you will give yourself a flat tire in a second if you choose something you believe is actually harmful.

Negative catabolic thoughts and emotion can literally impact your metabolism and other weight-related systems making it easier to gain and harder to release weight. Actually doing the action you believe to be detrimental—and the resulting guilt, shame, etc.—increases the negative effects.

Remember this the next time you are having a thought such as, “That cake is so fattening. I really shouldn’t eat it.”

This is because every action is preceded by a thought and belief, all of which have energy. Think of each step as increasing your momentum. Aligning the energy of a thought, with the energy of a belief, and energy of the action in the direction of your goal is like a train gaining speed towards your destination. It has the full force of momentum behind it.

The energy of an action that is heading in the opposite direction of your thought or belief is like having a head-on collision. At the very least it’s painful. At worst, it can derail your efforts.

The key is to put all of your support behind your decisions.

You do that by:

  • Being present and committed to what you are doing in the moment. For instance, put all of your energy into the workout you are doing. You can then gauge by the results you are getting if you need to rethink your plan.
  • Making decisions quickly. Don’t waste a lot of energy debating between a protein bar and shake. Pick one and move on.
  • Choosing the option that feels best. There are days it feels good to your body to take the stairs. There are days your body needs a rest and the elevator feels better. Pay attention to how the decision feels, and choose the better feeling option. It’s always the right one.
  • Fully committing to the choice you are making, particularly if they are pretty similar. If grabbing a protein bar helps you get out of the house on time, that’s a great option. Don’t second guess it. You can even boost the power of the decision by being grateful for the option.
  • Getting your thoughts, beliefs, and actions in alignment. If you believe eating any cake on your diet is “bad,” make sure you keep that off your fork. If you really want some cake, how can you feel good about eating it? Perhaps you can align with the idea of having a free meal once a week that will enable you to have a little cake and still meet your goals. Then when you do have some, enjoy it! If you feel guilt afterwards, your thoughts and beliefs aren’t in alignment with your actions.

Pay attention to how you feel. Positive, anabolic emotions such as confidence, contentment, eagerness, etc., are a sign that you are headed towards your goals and are gaining momentum. Negative catabolic emotions such as guilt, deprivation, doubt, etc., are a warning sign that your thoughts and beliefs are headed in the opposite direction of your goals and that you are in danger of not getting where you want to go.

How can you begin to shift your thoughts and beliefs so that they are in alignment with your actions? What difference does that make in meeting your goals?

Together we can do it!