The assignment for day 12 of my Gratitude Challenge is to make the effort to live life with a positive outlook.
This would normally be a slam dunk for me. This is something I focus on every day. As the assignment describes, my intention is always to restrain from criticizing the people around me, dare to see the glass as half full, listen more than I speak, give freely of myself, and practice kindness at every opportunity.
So it’s very interesting to me that I awoke this morning with intense physical discomfort that is centered around my female parts, which are soon to be history. Perhaps if you were to witness the intensity of this discomfort, it would give you an inkling as to why I have made this decision. After dealing with these issues since I was 15 and trying more alternative treatments than I can count on both hands, it feels like the next logical step to take more mainstream action.
I have been reluctant to share this decision with you fabulous readers for a number of reasons. Mostly because I have been worried about your judgment. My assumption is that many of you will challenge my decision-making process to turn to surgery, and I frankly don’t want to justify it. There is also the concern that people won’t want to go to a wellness coach who isn’t, in their opinion, 100 percent well.
That sounds like an immediate negative reaction to me. Here I am altering my behavior because I am afraid of what you might think. That’s never a good reason to do anything. And frankly, it’s being critical of you without giving you the benefit of allowing you to respond however you respond.
So today, with this assignment, I’m changing how I think about sharing my surgery with you. There may be people who judge me and that’s OK. There may be people who don’t understand that this feels like the next logical step on my wellness journey, and that’s OK, too. Because I know what I went through to get to this point. And I know that this feels strongly like the direction the Universe is guiding me. And if either of those change based on what others say, then I do need to rethink my course of action.
I’m also choosing to share this because maybe my decision to pursue this path to wellness will inspire or soothe someone else who is struggling with their own wellness journey. And to me, nothing is more important than being of benefit to someone else.
So on December 14, I am going in for a hysterectomy. Or as I like to call it, getting spade. Yes, I plan to get micro-chipped at the same time. That should make running without identification a lot easier.
I feel really good about this decision, and now I feel good about sharing this journey with you. And I really look forward to leaving behind 29 years worth of female trouble and pursing an even healthier and happier future.
Together we can do it!